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Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 10/6/12

Everyone’s face in the second panel is pretty much exactly what you’d expect from a scene in which three desperately poor people are about to eat a canned bean dinner in a dilapidated shack in an isolated rural hamlet. Where do you suppose Snuffy is? Jail, again? Do you think they’re sadder that one of their family members can’t be there, or happier because he’s a useless criminal and his absence means more beans for them?

Archie, 10/6/12

Notice that by the time Archie blows that whistle in the first panel, Moose is just standing around looking sheepish. Despite Archie’s ostensible attempts to impose some sanity on this “friendly” game of touch football, he knows better than to interrupt Moose when he’s in the midst of whatever violent whole-body fugue state resulted in the terrible injuries revealed in panel three.

Pluggers, 10/6/12

Speaking of looking sheepish, normally I find the faces of the various man-animal abominations who inhabit Pluggers to be fairly inexpressive, but both father and cub here are wearing pretty piercing looks of shame — poo-based shame.

Herb and Jamaal, 10/6/12

Are rising energy prices starting to degrade vital government services? Or is Jamaal just letting some guy’s house burn down, for fun?

Gil Thorp, 10/6/12

If you’ve ever wondered what it would like to perch on the belt of a guy who is really, really psyched about the terrible micksploitation slogan he’s come up with for a high school football team, and is also wearing a waistcoat for some reason, then today’s Gil Thorp is for you, my friend.

Beetle Bailey, 10/6/12

How is it that whoever wrote this cartoon doesn’t cry themselves to sleep every night, just like Mrs. Halftrack? This is probably the saddest thing I’ve seen in the comics in months, and I read Funky Winkerbean daily.

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Herb and Jamaal, 10/3/12

Oh, Herb, you were doing so well with this analogy for a panel or so — yes, “endorse” could mean “lend credence to” when talking about a rumor! — but then I’m afraid you’ve just spun out of semantic range, since it’s not clear at all what it would mean to “cash” a rumor. Presumably if there were more panels we’d see him musing about how you should always be suspicious of rumors without built-in watermarking features, and that you can now log in to your bank and see scans of cancelled rumors rather than having them mailed back to you with your statements, etc. I was going to say that, since this misguided metaphor is playing out in thought balloon form, Herb at least won’t embarrass himself in front of his customer, but then I remembered that he ran away from the guy with his fingers in his ears shouting “NO, NO, NO! DON’T TELL ME!”

Ziggy, 10/3/12

Ziggy’s dentist is about hit him in the face with an enormous hammer.

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Herb and Jamaal, 9/26/12

How much salt do you generally consume when someone plays the old “salt in the sugar bowl” trick on you? Like, significantly less than a spoonful, most of which you end up spitting out because whatever you intended to put sugar on tastes repulsive with salt on it, right? Can you imagine how many times someone would have to do this to you to cause any real increase in your blood pressure? Like, every day, for years. It’s actually much more likely that Jamaal’s blood pressure is up because his business partner and supposed best friend is a vicious prankster, and it’s extremely stressful wondering when the next “hilarious” gag will cause him physical discomfort and/or bodily harm.

Family Circus, 9/26/12

Good lord, what sort of violent, Keane-persecuting hellscape lies outside the walls of the Kompound? Quick, everyone, let’s seal ourselves in the basement! It’s the only way to be safe!

Hi and Lois, 9/26/12

Hey, everybody, it’s a Curtis-Hi and Lois crossover! Because if there’s one thing we all associate with Curtis, it’s the meticulous curation of unopened classic toys. Remember, there’s no better way to tip your hat to your fellow cartoonists than to use one of their character designs but then completely ignore any of the personality traits they’ve developed for that character!

Apartment 3-G, 9/26/12

“Right here, just below my eyeball. Remember, Greg, this is the most erotic spot on a woman’s face. Now lick it. LICK IT!” Ladies, Lu Ann is showing how you can ensure that a date’s refusal to come up to your apartment won’t be so polite next time.