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Judge Parker, 3/12/21

So the current Judge Parker storyline has veered back to ex-CIA assassin on the lam April maybe stalking her ex and their daughter, but mostly I wanted to show you these very good drawings of Randy just having a complete meltdown. It’s pretty fun, right? Pretty fun that this child of privilege is just utterly losing, as his bad decision to marry the daughter of an arms-dealing clan comes back to bite him in the ass, repeatedly? To borrow a meme from the kids, here’s how it started:

And how it’s going:

The Lockhorns, 3/12/21

I’m absolutely loving the idea that before he met Loretta, Leroy refused to make romantic connections with anyone he couldn’t contact toll-free on his landline. The customer service reps at major home and auto insurance agencies? The good people at Time-Life Books? The time-and-temperature lady? Just a few of the broken hearts Leroy left in his wake.

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Dennis the Menace, 2/21/21

After a solid year of ignoring the coronavirus pandemic and muddling through in its mostly ’50s nostalgia world, Dennis the Menace has decided to abruptly leap into current events with both feet. How would Mr. Wilson — an elderly man whose human contact comes almost entirely from his wife, who he tolerates, and the neighbor kid, who he despises — deal with the isolating effects of social distancing? Well, it turns out the answer is “great.” Not so great for Dennis’s parents, obviously! There’s a reason they let him wander unsupervised through the neighborhood, after all.

Judge Parker, 2/21/21

It’s no secret that Judge Parker has gotten significantly less zany in the post-Woody Wilson era. That’s why I’m very excited about it taking a sharp turn into a new chapter, and that new chapter is: Godiva Danube: Ghost Sexpot!

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Judge Parker, 12/19/20

A few years back, Judge Parker Senior wrote The Chambers Affair, a mystery/spy novel that received a bad review from a snooty Ivy League academic but raves from everyone else, including vicious gun runners and the husband of the aforementioned Ivy League academic, so I assume it was a fun, breezy potboiler. I’m very sad that we didn’t get to see Alan try to pitch a sequel, in which our hero Chambers (?) spends 400 pages musing on the complexity of life and the moral grey areas we all need to grapple with, only to be laughed out of his publisher’s office.

Daddy Daze, 12/19/20

I haven’t been reading Daddy Daze for very long, but if there’s one thing I know about the Daddy Daze baby, it’s that he’s extremely, unnaturally mobile and very curious about everything, so why on Earth would you keep a breakable vase on top of an obviously wobble-prone table in the same house as him? (This problem would not be rectified by putting the Daddy Daze baby in a hamster ball.) Please, Daddy Daze daddy, demonstrate a little savvy about your own universe, I beg of you.

Dick Tracy, 12/19/20

Sam knows that a war is like just about any other product in this mass-produced age: mechanized, executed on a grand scale, leaving no room for the personal touch. Now, a broken neck? That’s an artisanal murder, that’s what that is.