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Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 8/6/12

Since much of electoral politics consists of convincing large groups of people that all their problems are caused by small groups of people, it was only a matter of time before attack ads started singling out individual private citizens by name. Picking on Snuffy Smith and his friends is a smart move, actually, as it won’t lose anybody a single vote; due to a misunderstanding of the phrase “no taxation without representation,” Hootin’ Holler refuses to allow the Elections Board to set up polling places in the community, because they believe that in so doing they’re also keeping out the revenooers.

Momma, 8/6/12

God help me, but I love Francis’s sly look in panel three. “Hmm, I hadn’t considered that, actually! You know, for all her bluster, Momma does have some sound business sense. Gosh, I love lollipops!”

Apartment 3-G, 8/6/12

If by “tall,” you mean “the exact same height as Margo, who has never been depicted as particularly tall,” and by “shy,” you mean “openly discussing his emotional state with a total stranger within seconds of meeting her,” but otherwise, sure, whatever, narration box.

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Momma, 7/5/12

Momma owns a bottle of some kind of incredibly fast-acting and powerful pesticide, which is no doubt highly toxic to all living things that come in contact with it (e.g., Francis, Momma).

Wizard of Id, 7/5/12

This lady is “keeping her husband on his toes” by threatening to have immolated alive.

Hi and Lois, 7/5/12

Ditto can control the weather, or perhaps the very flow of time itself, with his mind, but isn’t really very good at it.

Spider-Man, 7/5/12

Something about the crazed madman who sent a theaterful of people running in terror and incapacitated her super-powered husband frightens Mary Jane.

Shoe, 7/5/12

Shoe is really kind of a dick.

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Six Chix, 3/30/12

Color me 100% DELIGHTED at this frank depiction of three ladies just getting stone cold blotto in the comics. In fact, it took me a moment to get that there was a pun in play here, and I thought the whole joke was “Ha ha, these three women have consumed an amazingly large amount of alcohol, and now they feel really unpleasant!” I also thought that the lady in the middle had had her throat slit, possibly in a drunken brawl, though I guess that’s just supposed to be her chin. Anyway, things are never quite as good as I imagine them to be, but they’re still pretty good in this case.

Momma, 3/30/12

Oh, Momma, I think you’re confusing your lingo here! A “hit” in crime-talk is a murder for hire; maybe the term you’re looking for is “shakedown”? Or maybe you think Francis is going to purchase a “hit” of some illegal narcotic (that’s what the kids call it? a “hit of heroin”? the kids? the junkie kids?) with your money, something his sweaty overeagerness in panel three might suggest. I realize this is all taking place in a world where there’s a radio show called “The Greatest Hits On Earth” and also people still buy radios and they cost $40, but for some reason “hit” really bothers me.

Funky Winkerbean, 3/30/12

I have been trying to find something nice to say about Funky Winkerbean’s 40th anniversary celebration, and finally here’s something: it’s nice to see that 40 years ago Funky Winkerbean didn’t feel obliged to put ‘quotes’ around ‘phrases’ to ’emphasize’ the ‘joke.’

Judge Parker, 3/30/12

Ha ha, ladies, more concerned with interior decorating than with blowing away intruders, amiright fellas? It’s a wonder we even let them have guns!