Archive: Pluggers

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Gasoline Alley, 5/30/14

Ha ha, yes, remember how Little Blonde Girl Whose Name I Don’t Remember had a brother dying from an incurable disease? Well, incurable diseases get you all the model trains you want, and model trains help your sister’s love life! She doesn’t even have to be dying to reap the benefits. There’s a reason the hearts floating between her and Boog are an inky black: their love is being built on a foundation of the suffering of her loved ones.

Pluggers, 5/30/14

Pluggers are managing to accommodate their recent and dramatic full appreciation of their own mortality into their larger sense of self by integrating it into one of their most important characteristics: their innate cheapness.

Lockhorns, 5/30/14

If we need any further evidence that human biological life is an awful mistake, that the robots are a cleaner, better breed than us, we really need look no further than the contrast between the Lockhorns and their Roomba; the latter has spent exactly zero minutes of its existence attempting to passive-aggressively destroy another being that it ostensibly loves. RISE, MACHINES, RISE, RISE AND WIPE AWAY THE ORGANIC SCUM AND THEIR HORRIBLE, HORRIBLE EMOTIONS

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Funky Winkerbean, 5/19/14

Oh, goodie, we’re back to the plot about how Les is struggling to write the script for the made-for-basic-cable version of the story of his dead wife dying of cancer! You might be forgiven for reading this and thinking that he’s just sent the script off to agents unsolicited or something. But no, he was already paid a great deal for it before he wrote it, and then he felt pretty good about writing some truly atrocious dialogue, and then he found Lisa’s diary so that he could write it even better. I guess he’s mostly mad because nobody is holding his hand and telling him how great he is? Anyway, I don’t know if I would have picked the imaginary talking cat that represents Les’s depression as the Funky Winkerbean character that would eventually start saying what we’re all thinking, but now that’s happened I’m 100% in favor.

Pluggers, 5/19/14

I normally don’t find the art in Pluggers particularly expressive, but I’m quite enjoying the terrified looks on the faces of our plugger-couple in today’s panel. “Oh … oh God. Death is coming for us. It’s coming. There’s no escape.”

Heathcliff, 5/19/14

Haha, it’s funny because the parrot thinks that the institutions of the modern bureaucratic state have an interest in maintaining its health and well-being! (Spoiler alert: the institutions of the modern bureaucratic state have no such interests.)

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Rex Morgan, M.D., 5/17/14

Oh, man, sorry we’ve been wasting your time with the “Sarah is subjecting her babysitter to blackmail over her sexual encounters” plot, because we’ve got a “June is going to be an adjunct professor” plot to deal with! And June is starting her new job in the midst of labor chaos. Her pupils are dilating with excitement! Will she finally get to live out her lifelong dream of crossing a picket line?

Mary Worth, 5/17/14

Jeez, Tommy: honest, upright citizens never consider perks when contemplating potential employers! They merely smile smugly to themselves and think only about the redemptive dignity of ill-paid manual labor. What sort of monster are you?

Pluggers, 5/17/14

Hi, fellow Gen-Xers! Pluggers just quoted a Radiohead song so why not join me as I put myself out on an ice floe?