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Mark Trail, 6/14/08

Ever since Roger appeared with his little pencil mustache, the odds were good that he was going to get punched; but what would his transgression be? Now it’s becoming clear: he’s going to try to put the moves on Cherry! Whether it’s because the sight of her pink shirt and mom jeans and essential purity has inflamed his passions or because he and Kelly are engaged in some elaborate and sinister game of “good porn producer, bad porn producer,” only time will tell, but clearly villainy is afoot here.

I know we’re supposed to be outraged on behalf of the Trail household at Kelly’s big-city sneering, but you have to admit that the scene is kind of rustic, and the hosts aren’t exactly up on what constitutes hospitality, if panel three is any indication. “Lunchtime, everyone! Here’s a big bowl of ice! Go on, eat up, I’ll make more!” On the other hand, the ice may have been requested by Kelly and Roger for their movie, possibly for genital-cooling purposes.

Marmaduke, 6/14/08

Hey there Baldy McNeighbor, you look pretty smug for someone who’s about to be devoured by an enormous, hungry dog.

For Better Or For Worse, 6/14/08

You mean everyone who comes is going to get really high and end up encrusted with filth? If only, kids.

Pluggers, 6/14/08

You’re a plugger if nearly everybody you grew up with is dead.

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Family Circus, 6/5/08

A discussion about the nature of eternity, set against a blank, featureless void: behold the beginning of the transformation of the Family Circus into Existential Despair Comics.

Mark Trail, 6/5/08

“No! When Kelly took my pictures, she made me do things and touched me and it made me feel funny and bad! I MUST PROTECT THE ANIMALS!”

Gil Thorp, 6/5/08

“I mean, he’s still a total douche, so by all means carry on with the assault; I just can’t stand to see a savage beatdown conducted under false pretenses. It cheapens it, you know?”

Spider-Man, 6/5/08

“That’s my wife! The only thing she cares about more than my health is money, and the things you can buy with money.”

Pluggers, 6/5/08

Oh man, that plume of noxious smoke is just the delicious icing on the “fuck you, hippies”-flavored cake.

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Marmaduke, 5/23/08

Laughing at Momma was bad enough, but when I laughed at today’s Marmaduke, I knew that I should see a doctor. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that I don’t really care for coffee, but would love a piping hot cup of gravy; or maybe it’s the fact that Marmaduke and his female owner look so chipper, while the bipedal man of the house looks like he spent the previous evening unconscious in a gutter after being viciously beaten.

Dennis the Menace, 5/23/08

If Joey and Dennis turn to cannibalism, it could make up for many, many years of non-menacing, I tell you what.

For Better Or Worse, 5/23/08

“Isn’t it nice to see guys express their physical love for one another, so they won’t bother us with their disgusting urges?”

Pluggers, 5/23/08

Hey, pluggers! If you spent a little time thinking about your appearance, maybe someone might want to have sex with you! Just a suggestion.