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Pluggers, 3/25/21

I absolutely love the disgruntled look the plugger is flashing us in this panel. “Feminism, amiright, folks? Well, jokes on her: the way I see it, if I’m putting the seat back down, I don’t have to wipe the pee off the rim of the bowl.”

Dennis the Menace, 3/25/21

“Ha ha, get it? Because they’re in the sky! And also because they’re always plotting to destroy us. At night I can hear them whispering!”

Beetle Bailey, 3/25/21

“Ha ha, get it? Like the sounds of the machine guns that will be raining bullets down on you! Or maybe the ones you’ll be firing at strangers in the dark, never knowing how many deaths will be on your conscience. Anyway, enjoy your trauma!”

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Crankshaft, 3/11/21

OK, so we’ve been having a bit of fun with “The current run of Crankshaft strips were probably written in the early days of the pandemic, with somewhat amusing results.” But I think we can all agree that it’s a little uncanny that, in the year-ago writing strategy sessions, Funkyco decided that by March 2021 necessary post-pandemic fiscal stimulus would be held up by partisan legislative wrangling. Like, it wouldn’t have been impossible to predict, but I’m honestly pretty impressed — impressed enough that I was going to forgive today’s strip for neglecting to actually include a joke, until I remembered that mixing together two common and semantically related turns of phrase counts as a “joke” in Crankshaft.

Rex Morgan, M.D., 3/11/21

God, think about how sad it is to have a little kid visualize her dad wearing vaguely old-timey clothes while talking to his boring-ass real-life friends vague acquaintances, and saying that represents her “imagination run[ning] wild.” Guess that head injury was even worse than we thought, huh?

Mary Worth, 3/11/21

In other news, I’ve figured out what the absolute grossest phrase you can use while flirting is, and it’s “The dogs are chowing down … and now it’s our turn!”

Pluggers, 3/11/21

TIRED: Pluggers represent the “forgotten man” (and woman), the ones who keep their heads down and keep this country running despite tough times and the disdain of the elites.

WIRED: Pluggers have mastered the technology to send their enemies to the Phantom Zone. They experimented on their own parents to hone this weapon and will surely show us no mercy!

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Pluggers, 2/23/21

I have become increasingly concerned that there’s some kind of edict coming down from Pluggers HQ that all Pluggers panels have to be broadly relatable, and so we’ve started focusing less on pluggers and what makes them special and instead are just getting panels about things that literally all humans do. The worst thing about today’s panel is that this plugger has a sly look on his face, like he’s getting away with something. Sir, the doctor is literally getting a more accurate assessment of your weight this way! There’s nothing sneaky at all going on here!

Slylock Fox, 2/23/21

In the first panel, the guy at the window is thinking “God damn it! That rotten kid has used all my good sausages for his dumb little snowman tableau!” In the second panel, he’s thinking “Oh my god … the snowman has come to life … and he’s got a taste for flesh.”