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Shoe, 10/18/11

“And considering that I am, as near as anyone can tell, some sort of chicken, I was afraid that it would malfunction and fry me. What sort of monster are you, selling something that could cause serious burns? What? No, I’m not going to tell you why I bought it in the first place. I’m certainly not interested in killing, dismembering, and frying my fellow chicken-men and then feasting on their succulent thighs. Why did you even bring that up? What? No, I’m not the one who brought it up. I have to go now.”

Herb and Jamaal, 10/18/11

Herb and Jamaal are frequently a bit confused as to the slang the kids use today, so it maybe shouldn’t come as a big shock that they’ve manage to completely misunderstand the phrase “sexual chocolate.”

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By the time comics — with their six-week lead times and Eisenhower-era worldviews — get around to acknowledging hard times, it’s hard times. Let’s see how they’re taking it:

Rex Morgan, M.D., 10/11/11

The recession forced little Sarah Morgan to grow up fast — looks like she’s about thirty in panel three there. Rex sees it as his chance to regress, and turns his cap around like one of the Cool Teens. Pssst, Rex! Not Coors — Pabst!

Funky Winkerbean, 10/11/11

Ha, it’s funny because books are antiques. And the store owner got steamrolled by technology. And looks like Funky. Sucks to be you, Book Guy.

Shoe, 10/11/11

In hard times, it’s human nature to point the finger at something like the stock market — even when you lack human nature, or fingers.

La Cucaracha, 10/11/11

Big Peanut seems an unlikely villain, but OK. One quibble, though: for young and old, rich or poor, Spam® alone is Spam, absolute and irreducible.

Judge Parker, 10/11/11

And I think we know who’s really to blame.

Mark Trail’s Greatest Hits – a Fall Fundraiser special, part 2

Mark Trail — 1/21, 2/13, 8/5, 10/3, 11/21/06

Sincere thanks to everyone who’s contributed so far — y’all are great! All contributions received by 5:00 EDT Tuesday will ship Wednesday A.M., and appear on the GOOSETRAX map with Wednesday’s post.

— Uncle Lumpy

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Family Circus, 10/6/11

Does Ma Keane really feel a need to apologize that her crying infant is showing emotion? “Sorry, Billy, we can’t all be eerily affectless soul-dead monsters like you.”

Gil Thorp, 10/6/11

I want to briefly dip into the already dullsville Gil Thorp fall plot — seriously, it involves the football team’s quest for a kicker, a quest that will inevitably end with the forcible recruitment of the mysteriously squirrely Brody Abro — to point out that Milford actually has a soccer team, one that I don’t believe we’ve ever seen mentioned in the course of a strip ostensibly dedicated to high school sports. I assume that this is because the team isn’t coached by a Thorp, which in turn probably explains why the team is in contention for a championship.

Mary Worth, 10/6/11

Meanwhile, in Mary Worth, the entire week has been dedicated to the trials of leaving a phone message for someone at a hotel. Taste the excitement!

Shoe, 10/6/11

“Ha ha! No, but seriously, we live in a monstrous dictatorship with no respect for human rights.”