I eat again at the so-called Soul Food place, and yet again I fail to consume a soul. Am I misinterpreting the signs, or is this place lying to me? The owner pries into my writing. I tell him only truth, and he seems troubled. Perhaps his soul is troubled. I could calm it. I could devour it. His partner is nowhere to be seen. The restaurant is empty. Today I will eat soul food.
Mark Trail, 11/30/13
“Sure, after making half-assed attempts to disguise ourselves, we’ll just tell you our full names, what could possibly go wrong? The shining divine rays behind your head and accompanying chorus of angels doesn’t indicate how this is going to go down, probably!”
Crankshaft, 11/30/13
oh my god he didn’t invite her back to his house this is better than even I could have imagined
Hey guys, I’m traveling for the Thanksgiving holiday and so I’m going to skip doing a COTW this week, OK? Let’s give DaveyK another week at the top. Hope you’re enjoying your turkey comas!
Heathcliff, 11/29/13
I love that the canary is taunting the hungover Heathcliff with a “gobble gobble.” It still feels loyalty to its clade. It may not have been able to stop the horrible scene of carnage that happened yesterday — it may have been forced to sit there in a cage suspended just feet away the table, forced to listen to the awful sounds of grunting mammals tearing tender bird-flesh away from the bones — but at least it can take some small satisfaction that they’re suffering.
Mary Worth, 11/29/13
“Wait, what? He can’t sing anymore? This changes everything. Definitely not going to make a move on him anymore. Probably not even going to stay for the rest of this meal. If I excuse myself to the bathroom now, I could be on the 6 train before he even realizes I’ve left.”
Better Half, 11/29/13
AHH AHH AHH I TRIED TO WARN YOU I DID NOW A THREE-LIPPED TWO-MOUTHED HORROR WANTS TO DRAG ALL ITS LIPS OVER SOME POOR MAN’S FACE AHHHHHH