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Herb and Jamaal, 11/14/12

Jamaal mangles the ancient punchline, “… twelve people too stupid to get out of jury duty”, and outs himself as an idiot.

Pluggers, 11/14/12

… b-but the joke is that Spaniel-man is spending exactly the same time looking for his glasses and wearing them. Right? Am I missing some subtlety here? Oh, wait — it’s Pluggers.

Phantom, 11/14/12

It’s time for Hide the Lion — and anybody can play! Hot Queen is ticked, and the mighty Llongo warriors look all mopey. Everything is proceeding as Pissy Elder has forseen.

Heathcliff, 11/14/12

Garfield is disgusting. Oh, wait, this is Heathcliff. Well, Garfield is disgusting too, but this is Heathcliff.

Apartment 3-G, 11/14/12

Hey, it’s Six Differences time again! Can you spot the changes Greg has made to Mrs. Bloom’s apartment? Moving the invisible piano doesn’t count. (Hint: he locked the Taser® up with the sex toys. Margo’s in for one hell of a night.)

Spider-Man, 11/14/12

Yes, Peter — Sherry would have dug Genghis Khan, and you would have dug out the yak wallow behind his yurt.

— Uncle Lumpy

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Oh-ho, “action” aplenty in the soaps today — let’s dive right in!

Apartment 3-G, 11/13/12

The Revenge of the Men for Margo’s many unspeakable crimes is here revealed as a one-two punch. Even as Evan the Earnest Mole conspires with his Aunt Cathy to bankrupt Margo’s publicity agency, Greg the Arrogant Actor plans to fatten her up on that mountain of generic Thai food. Soon, Margo will have no economic incentive to leave her apartment, and will be too wide to do so anyway — making the world a safer place for interchangeable men, but placing Lu Ann and Tommie in a world of hurt.

Mark Trail, 11/13/12

Did you wonder why Mark was so blasé about his kidnapping and island imprisonment? Well, panels two and three reveal that Mark can see into the future, accepting compliments before they are given, and doubtless foreseeing the hail of fists by which he will eventually secure his freedom. It’s a miracle anybody can sneak up behind this guy. I guess the ability to predict the future doesn’t mean you have to be paying attention.

Rex Morgan, M.D., 11/13/12

June got free clams and Rex got Internet fame, but Ginger wins the chest-off.

Mary Worth, 11/13/12

OK, it’s been hinted at that Jim is a possessive creep, but established beyond any doubt that he has ONLY ONE ARM. So how exactly is he grabbing Dawn in panel 2? And just what the HELL is he doing with his bottle of soda? I think the answers demand a much larger exclamation point than Dawn is giving us here.

Family Circus, 11/13/12

The original Family Circus gremlins, Not Me, Ida Know, and Nobody, are invisible scapegoats for the Keane Kids’ adorable transgressions. But newcomers Just B. Cause and O. Yeah aren’t objects of blame at all, but oddly-attired “things kids say when they’re being jerks.” If they live long enough to reach middle school, we can expect the Kids to give us strung-out junkie Whatevs, Vegas card-shark Deal With It, and the principal character from Marvin, O. Crap.

Hey, Thel — that kitchen is a pigsty. And hot dogs for dinner again? Seriously, woman, just what the hell do you do all day?

— Uncle Lumpy

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Has it really been more than a year since the last Comics Curmudgeon fundraiser? Why, yes it has — we took a break this spring to make room for Josh’s Kickstarter initiative. So it’s time to catch up! If you’re new to the site, twice a year I encourage readers to join me in financial support of the Comics Curmudgeon, to keep it strong and independent and encourage Josh to ignore his legitimate responsibilities in favor of our trivial pop-culture amusements. If Josh helped enrich your life during the past year, why not return the favor?

Click the banner above to contribute by credit card or PayPal. Full details here, along with an index to more than 300 fundraising banners stretching all the way back to 2008. Enjoy, and thank you!

— Uncle Lumpy