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Pluggers, 8/11/10

You have to give Pluggers a little bit of credit for coming up with a half-assed excuse to rerun panels (“Spotlight on readers who have nothing better to do than send in tons of Pluggers ideas!”); some cartoons just rerun strips in no-assed silence, which speaks to a certain lack of pride of craftsmanship. Anyway, as a professional comics-reader, it’s interesting to keep track of how my own immediate, visceral reaction to a panel can change from month to month. For instance, when this panel first ran back in May, I apparently was moved to write some weird diatribe about awkward sentence construction, Jewish stereotypes, and plugger sex. Whereas today, I just laughed a cynical laugh, because it’s obvious to me now that point is that pluggers are cheapskates who’ve never given anyone a tip in their lives, and plugger wife here dies a little inside every time they sneak out of the diner without leaving anything on the counter, and now Mr. Plugger is making a big joke about it. And certainly he’s not going to do anything nice for his wife, who just has to take care of him for free, without expecting any sort of reward, even emotional rewards, ha ha! You might want to keep an eye on those scissors, buddy.

Dick Tracy, 8/11/10

Considering the important social function served by the morgue in the corpse-lousy Dick Tracy universe, it’s no surprise that the building’s facade features enormous letters that presumably light up at night, so people know right away where they should be dumping the bodies.

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Mark Trail, 8/10/10

Well, now we know why Mark’s neighbor has erected that fence: he needs to make sure that the lifelike androids he built to simulate his murdered wife and daughter are 100 percent realistic before allowing them to interact with humans. “Damn it, this naturalistic speech problem is the greatest programming puzzle I’ve faced yet! There’s got to be a way for the wife-robot to distinguish the shades of meaning that define the proper context for ‘too’ and ‘also.’ And why did I even bother programming the subjunctive mood into the little one?”

The Lockhorns, 8/10/10

Leroy’s generic job, his glum co-workers, and his drab, featureless office look to be almost as depressing as his home life. Fortunately, he has one thing there to cheer him up: a picture on his desk of someone who is quite clearly not his wife.

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This week: Your comment of the week, no fuss, no muss!

“Rusty wonders why the neighbors would put up a fence. Maybe it’s because your dumb dog runs all over the place? Just a thought.” –Flummoxicated

And the very funny runners up!

“I realize this may seem a bit petty for Margo, but our clue to her odd behavior lies in her line in panel one: ‘I’m busting out of this joint.’ Obviously, Margo’s body is currently being inhabited by a Prohibition-era mobster. She no doubt has dozens such damned souls on hand to autopilot her body through boring parts of life while she turns her malevolent gaze elsewhere.” –Warren

“I guess I Dressed in the Dark is sort of like jury duty. They have to keep the A3G girls sequestered lest they pick up a fashion magazine and suddenly they know too much.” –Carly

“Err, Mark, aren’t you supposed to give the kid the explanation that Sally and the dogs went to live on a farm where they’ll be happier? The grownups can handle the truth.” –ScienceGiant

“So I signed up Sally, the old dog lady, up for working on a farm! When I explained to her how much hard, physical labor this would involve she started crying!” –AndyL

“We also wonder if poor Sassy got the bath that she ran away from to start this episode.” –Fashion Police

“I’m betting that this is no training at all, but some sort of army testing of ‘white noise’ subliminal messages. Sure, Beetle is ‘learning’ about the M249. Alone in a totally white room, devoid of anything but a huge machine gun and a crate, with subliminal messages pumping in from hidden speakers as Sarge looks on from a two-way mirror. Next strip is going to show a Camp Swampy entirely covered in blood.” –mgm

“Sam looks pretty menacing in that last panel. ‘Toughen you up, huh? I’ve got something that will toughen you up. These sodas are room temperature … now drink up!'” –Walker of Dog

“I know the big animal shots in Mark Trail are just there for show or something, but something about that fish intrigues me. You can really picture the serene lake just outside Mark’s cabin, gently glittering in the sunlight to denote that all is well in the Lost Forest. Suddenly, this hideous fish breaks the surface, screaming ‘FUUUCK. SOMEONE KILL ME,’ before vanishing beneath the water again.” –Tophat

“There has to be some other way — an updated way — to convey ‘these people are poor.’ Because plaster and lath hasn’t been popular since the 50’s, but then again neither has Mary Worth.” –Thomas B.

“It would appear that Fred is sitting on a piece of styrofoam, possibly the packing material from the dresser next to him.” –Scott Bot

“Man, is Mike going to be surprised when he discovers his father is The Invisible Man and has always been there for him. It will be heartwarming and sentimental, until Dr. Mike completes his transformation into The Wolfman already in progress.” –Black Drazon

“Note to Mike: It takes a pretty special person to pull off an orange suit. You are NOT a special person.” –Aiantis

“That fence isn’t new; it was put there for the Truman Show-esque reality show they’ve been filming in the Lost Forest since 1946 — Who Wants to Punch a Shaggy Communist?” –bunivasal

“An adult movie called NUDITY? Are those people passing through the red light district in Herb and Jamaal’s city?” –Dr. Weird

“I love how every panel of Funky Winkerbean looks like it was lit with a single bulb dangling from a cord in some torturer’s basement.” –Patrick

“It’s nice to see the Dick Tracy artist throwing a bone to his target demographic, which he knows is comprised mainly of dangerously violent hermits and loners unfamiliar with social media devices and new technology in general. He can’t just assume they understand the concept of talking on the phone to another human being. ‘LOOK, IT’S A CELLULAR PHONE. SEE? THERE’S A KEYPAD, AND A SCREEN, AND EVERYTHING. NO WIRES, BUT STILL A PHONE. TEL-LE-PHONE. ALSO, BE GOOD OR DICK TRACY WILL DISMEMBER YOU.” -Krazy Kat

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