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Gasoline Alley, 7/19/23

I always respect Gasoline Alley’s commitment to doing shambolic, pointless plots that seem to go on forever, and we’re in the middle of a real stemwinder at the moment. To recap: Rufus is still in the hospital due to his head injury, still has amnesia, and is still showing more skin than I’m comfortable with. Today’s strip is noteworthy because of the comical terror in which these two rustics regard the Automatic Robotic Techno-nurse. This can’t be the result of sheer ludditism, since they’ve taken technological advances like CAT scans in stride in the course of their medical adventure, so it must be that they’re shocked that anyone would go through the trouble of building a humanoid robot that carries pills and decanters in its hands for this purpose, when an automated and wheeled cart would be much more efficient and easier to implement.

Dick Tracy, 7/19/23

Speaking of plots that go nowhere, Dick Tracy is in the middle of a plot that has been going so nowhere that I haven’t bothered featuring it here much, though I will tell you that there was a whole week where Dick became obsessed with a chunk of plaster found at a crime scene that was from a very specific Art Deco decoration on the front of a very specific building. Anyway, you’d think a guy that much into historic urban architecture would at least consider that the story behind moving trucks showing up in a largely abandoned warehouse district might be “gentrification” rather than “crime.”

Judge Parker, 7/19/23

Good news, everyone! A sweaty guy in a suit holding a surprisingly large knife has shown up in Judge Parker, and there’s never been a soap opera plot that couldn’t benefit from that kind of development.

Gil Thorp, 7/19/23

Gil Thorp has an intermittent tradition of doing wacky summer plotlines like “Coach Kaz becomes a rock star’s bodyguard” or “Marty Moon gets grifted at golf” or “Gil does a charity pro wrestling match with a guy whose angle is that he has Alzheimers.” But will any of those be able to hold a candle to 2023’s Summer Of The Throuple?

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Gil Thorp, 7/18/23

Oh, I forgot to mention earlier that after Gil’s arch-rival Luke Hernandez had an on-field meltdown that resulted in his losing his job, Gil bumped into him at a bar and offered to save him from penury by hiring him as Milford’s new wrestling coach. You’d think such of show of dominance, demonstrating the Gil does not view Luke as a threat and never has, would be the worst humiliation that would be visited upon the man, but now Gil is piloting a tiny aircraft and has somehow forced Luke to come along for the ride, leading him to barf right here in front of the readers and God and everybody, showing us that it’s going to be a long year for Coach Hernandez.

Crock, 7/18/23

I like how completely distraught this lady (does she have a name, or did the Crock brain trust just think of her as “the cute one” and leave it at that) looks in the first two panels here. Like when you hear that a guy “left the bathroom a mess again,” you know the details probably aren’t good, but she still poses a hopeful question, trying to figure out the least offensive possible scenario here. Honestly, good for her, that she still can conceive of positive outcomes in the world she lives in, which is the syndicated newspaper comic Crock.

Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 7/18/23

Wow, this strip really is going to keep milking pickleball for laughs all week, huh? Kind of like how Doc Pritchart is going to keep milking the Medicaid system until the Office of the Inspector General catches up with him.

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Mary Worth, 7/17/23

Congratulations, Greta! You may be depressed due to trauma, but you’re at least seeing a vet who recently started seeing a therapist himself due to his own trauma-based depression. Does that mean that Dr. Ed is as good as a licensed therapist? Ha ha, no, absolutely not, but he’s a lot more forgiving about his patients pooping in the middle of a session than an actual therapist would be.

Hi and Lois, 7/17/23

Congratulations, The Boy, The Mole, The Fox, and the Horse! Not only were you “shortlisted for the 2020 British Book Awards Non-Fiction Lifestyle Book of the Year,” but you also got a barely legible appearance in a Hi and Lois strip where Hi and Lois are mad at each other for reasons neither will really articulate and the vibes are real bad!

Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 7/17/23

Congratulations, pickleball! You’ve reached the stage where the creative team for Barney Google and Snuffy Smith thinks its readership will know what you are, so you must be an integral part of American life at this point! (Bitcoin hit this stage back in 2015.)