Archive: Beetle Bailey

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Pluggers, 8/29/26

The key to unlocking this scene, to my mind, is the cobwebs. Pluggers now spend all their pooping time doomscrolling just like the rest of us, but unlike the rest of us are letting their long-abandoned late ’00s Reader’s Digests moulder, unread, untouched, and unloved, which really raises questions about when the last time anything in that bathroom was cleaned in general.

Rex Morgan, M.D., 8/29/26

Against all odds and the pressures of the very fabric of their reality, the scam twins were on the verge of talking themselves into doing something interesting like kidnapping Sarah. That’s why the strip had to call in the big guns, in the form of their grandpa Lyle Ollman, inventor of the Ollman Technique, the self-help/brainwashing process now being marketed as the Mirakle Method. I don’t know that we’ve ever actually seen the Technique/Method in action, but based on today’s strip it seems to mostly involve an old man berating you to get your life together and maybe go back to community college, which is frankly a little underwhelming.

Beetle Bailey, 8/29/26

I genuinely enjoy Beetle’s silent body language here. “I’m just gonna … I’m gonna go eat these chips in my bunk, I think.”

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Beetle Bailey, 8/21/26

Big news, everyone! The men of Camp Swampy have finally decided to murder Sarge!

Daddy Daze, 8/21/26

Big news, everyone! The Daddy Daze daddy and the Daddy Daze baby are going to die in some kind of fiery car disaster!

Dennis the Menace, 8/21/26

Lots of strips have managed to shift focus over the years, even minimizing their title character: Blondie is really more about Dagwood now, Funky Winkerbean became a second banana in his own strip to Les Moore of all people, and Barney Google famously became Barney Google and Snuffy Smith and then Barney Google vanished from it for a good chunk of the 20th century. And sure, the remaining comics all have decades more of nostalgia built into them now and are less malleable in the public mind, but Dennis the Menace definitely seems to be making a bid to be about unpleasant interactions between Mr. and Mrs. Wilson, like it’s a Lockhorns for seniors, or an edgier Pickles. Sure, for the time being, they have to have Dennis frolicking somewhere in the panel, but soon, well, here’s the big news, everyone: get ready for Hank Ketcham’s Legal Heirs Present: The Wilsons! Featuring Dennis “The Menace” Mitchell.

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Crankshaft, 8/19/26

The last time Crankshaft and Harry Dinkle started an adventure together, Crankshaft looked real cherry but it ended up with Harry confronting the truly depressing circumstances of his father’s death. Now Ed has shown up at his place of work to drag him off on some other journey and he looks pissed, so maybe this time will turn out to be more fun for Harry, or maybe Crankshaft has just decided to murder him and put him out of his misery.

Rex Morgan, M.D., 8/19/26

At one point the scam twins were thinking about kidnapping a child, but then they realized that would not only get them in a lot of trouble, but also make this strip dangerously exciting, so now they’re trying to negotiate down to an acceptable level of plot development. I love the idea that squatting is too much of a commitment to bother doing. Like, most people squat just because that means they get to live someplace for free, but in the Twins’ conception, they’d be squatting for revenge, which means they’d have to stick around even if it turns out that the Morgan house has bad vibes or is unpleasant to be inside (it definitely does and is).

Beetle Bailey, 8/19/26

Hey, General, I just want to point out that the U.S. has fought in, like, several wars in the time that you’ve been an officer. Heck, there’s one going on right now! I know what you mean is that you want to have been in one of the cool ones, not the cringe wars we keep finding ourselves in lately, but still, I feel like you shouldn’t be quite so vocal on this point at the office if you don’t want to find yourself abruptly in the field.