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Mother Goose and Grimm, 7/21/25

You all know that “fire hydrants are like toilets, to a dog” is one of my pet peeves, but I frankly find it a million times less objectionable than I do “toilet water is like alcohol, to a dog, in that, among other things, it reduces their inhibitions and makes them more sexually aggressive.” People know the water in a toilet is just regular water, right? What do they think is in there to make Grimm here drunk? Is it piss? Do they think you can get drunk by drinking piss?

Intelligent Life, 7/21/25

Love to go to the movies with my pal, ask “So what did you think of [full movie title, including the colon]” as the credits roll, and then listen to him give some half-baked rambling metaphor that’s about box office numbers or maybe media coverage. That’s what the beautiful art of film is all about, to me!

Between Friends, 7/21/25

You know the old saying: “Show, don’t tell. And if you can’t show, tell in the form of showing a conversation between two people about the thing you’re trying to show. And if you can’t do that, show one of the two people summarizing the conversation in thought balloons as they’re having it.”

Family Circus, 7/21/25

“So how come you’re still talking instead of shutting up, dumbass?” –Sam, probably

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Between Friends, 1/29/25

Really kind of depressing that in every panel where we see the Blonde Between Friends Friend’s face here, her facial expression is nothing but grim resignation. She’s not actually getting any joy out of keeping this egg tray. She’s not happy the world is like this, or that she’s like this. But she’s not getting rid of the tray!

Blondie, 1/29/25

I guess it would’ve been a little on the nose for Blondie’s flashback to show her and Dagwood actually saying the phrase in question in their vows, but it’s a little unnerving to instead see them just staring ahead and simultaneously visualizing a big sandwich while the minister blabs on about what Jesus wants their relationship to be like or whatever. Dagwood is doing this because he’s just thinking about big sandwiches all the time, but Blondie … well, I’m not sure what’s going on with her, whether she’s trying to psych herself up to get married to a Big Sandwich Guy or if she’s thinking about spending the wedding night making big sandwiches to feed to him, sexually, or what. Anyway, this wedding sadly cannot hold a candle to the time Dagwood’s parents got him hepped up on ether and tried to force him to marry Blondie’s roommate.

Alice, 1/29/25

Oh, also, Alice has gotten dumped by her boyfriend, a grown man (?) who dresses like a comical child, which has to be pretty embarrassing for her. This is a lady who’s been kidnapped by aliens and flirted at by air conditioners but I have to think she sees this as a low even for the context of the strip.

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Blondie, 9/10/24

Dagwood demands that the dietary preferences of the majority be enforced on all through the power of the State. Today I learned Dagwood is literally Hitler. And here I always thought it was that guy over in Marmaduke.

Between Friends, 9/10/24

Torn between the listless advances of her French boss Jean here and the ambiguous affections of her ex Steve back home, Slut Friend Maeve resolves to make something happen. This being Between Friends, it’s far more likely to involve shoes than sex.

Six Chix, 9/10/24

The next time you’re on deadline for a blog post, trust me you do not want to go Googling “What does Godzilla eat?” or “Do pigs have souls?” But if you’re ever in Decatur Indiana, make it a point to check out Soul Pig: it’s got four and a half stars on TripAdvisor! I’ve read all the Yelp reviews, and apparently their smoked ham is delicious! Now what was it I was supposed to be doing…?

Bizarro, 9/10/24

Airport Security: “Arbitrary, opaque bureaucratic intrusions or world-historical cruelty and oppression? Make up your mind, buddy, you’re holding up the line!”
Me: “I’m thinking, I’m thinking!”

Rex Morgan, M.D., 9/10/24

♭♪ “Sit on, Truck Tyler, sit on!” ♮♬

—Uncle Lumpy