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Archive: Crock

141

I’m rooting for the perverts, obviously

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Andy Capp, 5/19/26

Today’s Andy Capp serves two different and distinct audiences: (1) Brits opposed to socialized medicine who will shove it in the face of the average taxpayer and say “Do you want your National Insurance contributions wasted keeping this lout alive?”, and (2) perverts who have been waiting since this strip’s debut in 1957 to see Andy with his shirt off.

Rex Morgan, M.D., 5/19/26

Mud has always had a vague air of menace since he first showed up in this strip, and while it’s waxed and waned, many of us have been wondering “Is this guy ever gonna beat the shit out of someone or what?” We may at last get an answer!

Crock, 5/19/26

You ever get curious about what the Crock guys in the isolated guard tower do with themselves all day? It’s pills! The answer is that they’re doin’ pills!

133

Jokes, with pictures

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Crock, 5/16/26

This is one of those Rodney Dangerfield-style one-liners that sort of makes sense when you first hear it but just kind of falls apart the more you think about it. You’re tellin’ me the waiter … mails you your fortune? Is that because you’re such a contemptible figure that he doesn’t want to interact with you? But if so, how did you get the rest of your meal? Or, is it because the fortune itself is so toxic and terrifying it needs to be conveyed with the utmost of care? But if that’s the case, wouldn’t mailing it involve more contact with the fortune than just swiftly walking it into the dining area and handing it off to the customer? And why get dozens of innocent postal workers involved? If only the comics were a visual medium that could shed some light on this, but no, according to iron-bound convention, this joke must be relayed by three identical drawings of a guy saying it at us.

Shoe, 5/16/26

I’m all for this wholesome depiction of Skyler and his teammate engaged in the time-honored tradition of remembering some guys, though I’m curious as to whether this other dude just blurted out a commonly known Charles Barkley fact or if there was some lead-up to it. My big complaint though is that they’re sitting in chairs. I know that’s probably “realistic” about high school sports of whatever, but if Skyler is complaining via baroque wordplay about always being on the bench, in the sense of being held in reserve during a basketball game and never getting any playing minutes, they should show him sitting on a bench, in the sense of the big long wooden thing that multiple people can sit on.

Mother Goose and Grimm, 5/16/26

“Old people! They’re our main audience now! Is this the kind of slop you hogs like? I mean, uh, is this the sort of representation you fine people find respectful?” –the Mother Goose and Grimm creative team, I guess

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Mud Mountain TRIUMPH

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Crock, 3/2/26

The comic strip Crock and I have long-running and mutual antagonism, so I am generally reticent to say nice things about it, but I do occasionally think them. Like sometimes I think, “Crock sucks, but unlike Marvin, it doesn’t really do gross-out bathroom jokes.” Alas, I was mistaken! Here’s a comic about how the cook at the local fancy restaurant used to piss and/or shit in the food.

Luann, 3/2/26

Ah, yes, Luann’s mom correctly sees her sexual and family history as being of a kind with other roles that define her economic relations with others, a truth as obvious for all of us as it is taboo to speak about. I’m glad someone in this family knows what’s up (other than Toni, who is clearly the smartest as she managed to avoid this get-together entirely).

Rex Morgan, M.D., 3/2/26

Oh, shit, oh crap, this is it, Rex Morgan, M.D., has been fully hollowed out and occupied by the roots country crowd and they’re about to formally seize control of the strip, they’re gonna make Rex put on some dumb retro cowboy outfit and go up on stage so they can jeer at him