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The Lockhorns, 6/25/20

Yes, Leroy is absolutely the sort of guy who would get involved in some high-anger, low-stakes battle on Reddit in the wee hours of the morning, and Loretta is absolutely the sort of woman who would check up on her husband’s Reddit account to find out what cyber-bullshit he’s been up to that she could make fun of. This was almost a Lockhorns panel that was true to its characters and also accurate about a fairly contemporary aspect of online life. Fortunately, just so as not to completely flabbergast everyone by pulling that off, the panel also includes the sentence “I see where you were a Reddit thread,” which is either a typo or a confession of not actually understanding what Reddit is or how it works, thus restoring balance to the universe.

Dennis the Menace, 6/25/20

At age five, Dennis is already falling prey to obsessive and unrealistic body image standards! The true menace is society.

Six Chix, 6/25/20

Oh man, see that lady there in the foreground? I hear her casseroles are devastating. That’s … a joke? I guess?

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The Lockhorns, 6/12/20

One thing I never get tired of reminding my fellow Olds who have become accustomed to using “millennial” as a synonym for “teen” is that the youngest millennials are adults in their mid-20s at this point and the oldest ones are middle-aged fogies in their late 30s. And while it’s never clear exactly how old Leroy and Loretta are supposed to be, it’s fully possible that they are, in fact, millennials. Today’s joke, then, was clearly inevitable.

Six Chix, 6/12/20

Honestly, how long have you been a cat owner that you haven’t already viewed cat food as pre-poop?

Dennis the Menace, 6/12/20

Dennis is so solipsistic that he believes that everyone is either trying to communicate with him or waiting for him to communicate with them, with no other options. Extremely menacing.

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Mary Worth, 6/10/20

Well, it looks like Saul has allowed his … first-cousin-once-removed-in-law? … to browbeat him into serving as Madi’s guardian for the summer. What do you think their first fight is going to be about? Since Saul forced Greta to put on a bow tie to match his own even before he got her home from the shelter, I assume it will be about Madi’s refusal to wear a bow tie. Presumably she’ll eventually put it on, signaling the resolution of this storyline’s conflict, after she’s figured out how to make it “goth.”

Dennis the Menace, 6/10/20

Casually letting Mr. Wilson know that amazing things are happening all around him, but that he’s so steeped in anger and poisonous nostalgia that he’ll never be able to truly appreciate them, is by far the most menacing thing Dennis has ever done.