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140

Monday egg chat

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Luann, 12/1/25

Back in the ’80s, when this strip first debuted and its characters were in high school but acted like they were 12, much of its energy was put into the competition between handsome hunk Aaron Hill and awful nerd Gunther Berger for Luann’s love. This eventually ended with Aaron moving off to Hawaii and Gunther actually becoming too good for Luann, but that doesn’t mean the strip doesn’t like to return to the classics, so today, when the characters are in college but act like they’re 15, there’s a new awful nerd obsessed with our heroine, and I do appreciate that they’ve taken steps to make Alan awful in a specifically 2025 way. Like the only way “Oh, do you think there’s a problematic age gap between my belovèd and myself? Well, I’ve done my research about historical sex affairs and come up with a little factoid that proves that’s no impediment” could get more of the moment would be if Alan triumphantly showed Bernice a bunch of AI-generated erotic anime-style images of him and Luann wearing Renaissance clothing to prove his point.

Dustin, 12/1/25

I think this may be the first Dustin I’ve ever seen where Dustin’s dad tries to have a genuine moment of connection and companionship with his son. That moment will end immediately after the third panel here, because Dustin’s terrible little quip will remind his father that he’s insufferable and that’s why nobody wants to spend time with him.

Mother Goose and Grimm, 12/1/25

OK, sure, if Humpty opened up that carton and cracked open an egg in cold blood? That’s a crime, and he deserves his punishment. But if he and the victim were in that carton together? Well, you can’t blame an egg for doing what he has to do in there, in a darkness that could end at any moment or last forever, a world where it’s crack or be cracked.

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I declare victory in my long war against Crock

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Herb and Jamaal, 10/29/25

One of my personal crosses to bear is that I cannot just go along with it when comics deliberately, and for “humorous” effect, conflate fire hydrants with toilets in ways that imply that they don’t actually understand why and how dogs pee on fire hydrants. But at least the strips I’ve complained about to this point involve whimsically anthropomorphized animals. Herb and Jamaal, by contrast, is about humans, who should know better, which is why I find this strip particularly puzzling. Is this supposed to be some kind of dog pee joke? Does Herb not realize that the water that comes out of a fire hose is the exact same water that comes out of a fire hydrant — that indeed fire hydrants exist entirely to supply water to hoses? Does Herb think that the water coming out of a hydrant is infected with dog pee, somehow? Is he visualizing someone putting their mouths right on a fire hydrant, the way you’re not supposed to put your mouth on a drinking fountain, but a lot of people do anyway? There’s a lot to think about here, and none of it pleasant.

Crock, 10/29/25

Oh, does the syndicated newspaper comic strip Crock want us to think it’s silly that this Legionnaire has some jokes about buzzards to tell? Well, if that’s so, why does the syndicated newspaper comic strip Crock tell jokes about buzzards all the time? Heh heh, I’ve now caught this strip in an act of hypocrisy from which there is surely no coming back.

Dustin, 10/29/25

Ha ha, fellas! You know how sometimes you can’t tell whether or not you can get horny anymore, because you hate your wife so much? This sure is relatable content, for guys!

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Quotable Monday

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Crankshaft, 10/27/25

“I mean, I get it! We’re all thinking it. We’re all thinking about the guy who dresses up in pizza boxes and how he’s mortal, and how he’s going to die someday, maybe right here in our restaurant. We’re all thinking about how we might have to pull these pizza boxes off his corpse and look at his face, for the first and last time. We all think about it all the time! But we don’t talk about it. You’ve got to learn not to talk about it.”

Hi and Lois, 10/27/25

“We also text each other about our husbands! Uh, all good stuff.”

Dustin, 10/27/25

“Anyway, long story short, I ruined my laptop.”