Post Content

Rex Morgan, M.D., 11/28/22

Oh my God, this Rex Morgan, M.D., plot really is going to be “Mud Mountain Murphy only pretended to have a catastrophic digestive situation so he could move up from opening act to headliner,” huh? Well, since Rex vaguely tried to offer Mud medical assistance, I look forward to him shutting down his clinic altogether after this. After all, how can he be sure that any patient who walks through the door isn’t just faking it to help their career in the entertainment business? And then Rex would have used a portion of his precious and limited reserves of human empathy for nothing. Better safe than sorry!

Dustin, 11/28/22

I guess when it comes down to it, none of us should be surprised that Dustin’s dad works at a law firm that specifically caters to real assholes who hate their kids, right?

Pluggers, 11/28/22

Look, everyone, it’s a drawing of a down-home, salt-of-the-earth dog-man guzzling laxative so he can shit himself thin! I dunno, man. I don’t know what I’m supposed to do with this one.

Post Content

Gil Thorp, 11/25/22

Gil has dug some old game tape out of a box to give us the supervillain origin story of his hated coaching rival, and the truly shocking information we learn is that (a) back in 1987 ,Marty Moon had a Fu Manchu mustache, and (b) back in 1987, football broadcasts used to just cut to commercial in the middle of some of the most exciting plays in the game.

Dennis the Menace, 11/25/22

Dennis’s grandfather always looks smug, but he’s really turned it up a notch here. “That’s right, George,” he’s thinking, “You have to put up with this little brat’s bullshit 24/7, and I get to come visit occasionally, get all the credit and affection, then fly back to my ‘active seniors’ community in Palm Springs just in time for the weekly key party. Suck it, loser!”

Dustin, 11/25/22

Dustin’s pal Fitch hasn’t really had much of a personality developed other than “is dumb,” so it’s quite striking to learn today that he’s a problem drinker with a great deal of self-loathing about it. Fitch, I hope you draw comfort in knowing that all of us have our struggles! For instance, I experience quite a bit of self-loathing because I’m able to remember the names of secondary Dustin characters without looking them up.

Post Content

Dustin, 11/20/22

Look, I’d be lying if I claimed that I haven’t myself stared at the various cutesy branded pants size designation at the Gap with a certain degree of animus, but here’s the difference between me and Dustin’s dad: I would not, when griping about this to my wife, push my glasses up on my forehead and pinch the bridge of my nose in a fit of comically exaggerated performative exasperation, so everyone would know just how much I hate it. I also wouldn’t harken back to some mythical golden age when we all just covered ourselves with voluminous wraps and it didn’t really matter what size or shape they, or we, were.

Rex Morgan, M.D., 11/20/22

Say what you will about Mud Mountain Murphy’s digestive problems and the degree to which he himself is responsible for them, but you have to admit that they provided Rex an opportunity to avoid some classic Buck-curated roots country bullshit. Everything happens for a reason, as Mary Worth would say!