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Family Circus and Dennis the Menace, 10/29/10

These two parents-on-the-floor panels were immediately adjacent to each other on my Chron page today, which allowed me to quickly come up with a game I like to call “Who’s the sociopath?” In the Family Circus it’s clearly Daddy, who’s sporting a sick little smile as he allows Jeffy’s utter terror and desperation to go on much longer than anyone should be comfortable with. (It should come as no surprise that budding sadist Billy can barely contain his glee at his brother’s panic.) Dennis, meanwhile, isn’t even deriving any joy from having literally knocked his mother out of her shoes and fused her brains into a molten lump. “Mommy isn’t moving anymore,” he tells his father, stone-faced. “Will we need to get a new mommy?”

Pluggers, 10/29/10

It’s true: blanket-stealing is only perpetrated by honest heartland folks of the sort depicted in Pluggers. We coastal elitists don’t worry about it, because we sleep under mile-long blankets woven out of feathers stolen from the wings of angels.

IMPORTANT SOCIAL NETWORKING UPDATE! You might recall from Wednesday that Mayor Dalton’s prostate has its own Pacebook page. It now also has its own page on Facebook, a somewhat more popular social networking service. Feel free to “like” it, or whatever you kids do!

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Mary Worth, 10/26/10

I have to admit that the current Mary Worth plotline, in which Jill is cartoonishly cruel to Adrian and Adrian laughs it off and Mary seethes, hasn’t really done a lot for me. The only thing of real interest is the intensity of the aforementioned Mary-seething. The face she makes today is particularly delightful!

I assume that today will begin the story’s turn, on the logic that the self-loathing Adrian will absorb any amount of abuse without complaint, but you can’t criticize her sainted bullet-ridden fiance. Watch out, Jill! Adrian’s feeble, ineffectual rage will soon be turned against you!

Gasoline Alley, 10/26/10

I haven’t really been paying attention to this Gasoline Alley comical-misunderstandings-leading-to-accusations-of-adultery plot and neither have you, but here, enjoy the denouement, in which Hoogy’s attempts to be poetic and sweet are met with only a grunt of dull-eyed incomprehension.

Family Circus, 10/26/10

Jeffy knows it’s important to determine which animals are patriotic Americans and which are filthy foreigners.

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Apartment 3-G, 10/24/10

Ha ha, how great is Margo’s striken facial expression in the final panel, as everyone else enjoys the pie-based good times? “Wait, ‘jam today?’ But we’re eating pie! What’s all this jam talk? Who’s jamming what, and where? WHY AREN’T I THE ONE DOING THE JAMMING?” Don’t worry, Margo, it’s just reference to some Lewis Carroll bit/mnemonic for remembering proper temporal meaning of various Latin adverbs, which is obviously a thing that normal people talk about all the time.

Family Circus, 10/24/10

Weird public Oedipal fantasy play? An unseemly interest in the teenage girl next door? Hiding in the bushes, watching the children? It’s apparent you’re a pervert, more like.