Archive: Lockhorns

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The Lockhorns, 6/4/21

Having done this blog for many years, I can tell you that there is definitely a weekly rhythm to many of the comics. Hopefully if you’re a reader of this blog, you are aware of enough comics “inside baseball” knowledge that you know that individual comics aren’t each written the day before they’re published or anything like that. They’re submitted weeks in advance, in Monday-through-Saturday chunks (Sunday strips are submitted separately and have to be sent in even earlier). And while I’m sure most cartoonists don’t sit down and power through six comics in one sitting, as you get towards the end of the week you definitely start to get some “I’m almost done with this, fuck it” vibes. I feel strongly that today’s Lockhorns, where Leroy assures Loretta that alcoholism is fine, actually, and he’s not sure why it gets such a bad rap, fits that bill, and yet (because I contain multitudes) I also think it’s pretty great, because sometimes you want that energy on a Friday, you know?

Rex Morgan, M.D., 6/4/21

You know what absolutely has not been phoned in, though? Today’s Rex Morgan, M.D. Just a symphony of incredible facial expressions from two guys who know they’re not supposed to find their kids incredibly irritating and so they won’t say that they’re incredibly irritating but they absolutely find all their little antics insufferable and can’t wait until they’re off at college or whatever. “He can’t see the face I’m making, so he probably assumes I actually love my kid, even though every moment I spend with them is a chore,” both men are thinking.

Mary Worth, 6/4/21

You know what would really help out Rex and Buck? If there were like a pane of thick, soundproof glass between them and their kids, and there was a phone that ostensibly let you talk to the person on the other side, but the phone wasn’t attached to anything, so it didn’t work. Ideally it would be the kid on the jail side of the glass, of course.

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Gil Thorp, 5/28/21

They say a happy marriage is one where each partner can still surprise the other, and by that definition my longtime partnership with soap opera comic strips has still got it. When this saga began at the library board meeting, little could I guess that it would lead here here, with a librarian gently letting a teen boy that she’s been acutely aware of his erotic assignations in the stacks, and looking over her glasses as she asks pointedly if he lacks for company tonight.

Hi and Lois, 5/28/21

Every once in a while, Hi and Lois likes to remind you that Beetle Bailey is Lois’s brother. Look, Chip has a picture of his Uncle Beetle on his nightstand! Also, it looks like Beetle has left the army and works for a fast food franchise now? Or maybe he’s joined a Communist army?

The Lockhorns, 5/28/21

I guess the joke here is that Leroy has made so little impression that his boss doesn’t even know his first name, but it’s pretty clear based on the banner that none of the underlings know their boss’s name either! Just a real sad lack of workplace camaraderie all around.

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Dick Tracy, 5/25/21

Wow, who could’ve possibly predicted that taking a protectee who already faced one assassination to the theater would’ve been a bad idea? Turns out this dress rehearsal wasn’t anywhere near as closed to the public as promised, so you better believe that our lovable pair of goth murderers are here to finish the job on ol’ Charlie. Anyway, I’m featuring today’s strip mostly to ask the very serious question of what in God’s name is going on with the mysterious figure in panel three. Is this yet another villain with a bizarrely specific costume shtick, wondering who’s here to horn in on his theater crime business? Or is this production of The Tempest just particularly avant-garde?

The Lockhorns, 5/25/21

Though I am by chosen profession a Comics Curmudgeon, and though I poke fun at The Lockhorns as much as anyone, my fundamental position on this comic from the beginning has been that I unironically like it. Today is a great example of its purity of essence. Leroy writhes in pain, having failed at a mundane household task, and Loretta looks at him, saying something cutting and genuinely funny, with absolutely dead eyes. It’s perfect. No notes.

Dennis the Menace, 5/25/21

It is absolutely in character and yet still absolutely infuriating that Henry has suited up for his macho weekend chores by putting what I’d bet money is a brand-new baseball hat and tool belt over the immaculately pressed dweeb-ass work clothes he wears most of the time. And I know some of you are going to say, “No, Josh, you don’t get it, he’s not planning on doing any chores, this is sex thing,” and if that’s the case he honestly ought to be more embarrassed about how he’s dressed.