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The Lockhorns, 10/24/25

Loretta has, presumably, been jogging for some time with her friend acquaintance who we are definitely never going to see again, and is only now passing by her husband, who has been sitting on that bench staring contemplatively into space for who knows how long. Because absolutely nothing the Lockhorns do is left to chance, especially when it comes to attempting to passive-aggressively destroy one another emotionally, we must assume that she carefully planned both her route and her conversational cadence so that this little bon mot would drop just as she was getting close enough for Leroy to hear it.

Mother Goose and Grimm, 10/24/25

I’m a normal person, so I do almost all my shopping either online or in a store, but some people do it over the phone, I guess? Maybe they’re all old and increasingly senile and the person on the other end has to say “Shopping…” every once in a while, just to remind them what they’re doing.

Pluggers, 10/24/25

Gah, pathetic, there’s no joke or wordplay or anything here, it’s literally just “Pluggers continue to engage in a traditional cultural/aesthetic practice, unlike most people, who have abandoned it or never knew about it in the first place.” They didn’t even put a plugger in the cartoon! I’d like to think they all refused to participate in such a half-assed non-gag.

Crankshaft, 10/24/25

I love how depressed this guy looks in the final panel. He doesn’t want to say this shit any more than you want to listen to it!

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Mary Worth, 10/22/25

“Sure, she can predict the future and bend animals to her will, but not in a big showy way that would attract attention! Sort of like how you own a boat large and powerful enough to defeat entire navies from anytime before about 1850 but you just use it to putter around the harbor once a month or so, if the weather’s nice.”

Dustin, 10/22/25

I’m pretty sure we’ve never seen Dustin express any interest in comic books or geek culture before? Despite what I said yesterday about nerd stuff, this makes his personality more interesting than I frankly find plausible.

Mother Goose and Grimm, 10/22/25

Yeah, so these guys are just staring into big bowls of brown … soup? Chocolate? Dog food? I don’t know if it’s fattening, but it’s definitely not appetizing.

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Mother Goose and Grimm, 10/20/25

Look, I know what I’m about to say is gonna make me sound like a humorless nitpicker, but I promise that I do in fact know that the whole point of “cartooning” is that you draw a person in a funny, unrealistic way that works only when you don’t think about what exactly is going on with the parts you can’t see, under the clothes or under the skin. But I gotta nitpick it when they make you think about it! Like, love handles are just above your hips, and I’m sure the Mother Goose and Grimm house style is to think of the waist of their characters as being comically high, and that’s hard to read when they’re wearing flowing robes like this demon is, but … those are boobs, right? Saggy boobs? They don’t look like love handles at all, I’m sorry, and I’m so mad about it I can’t even go in depth on how the “hell spa” wordplay doesn’t quite work (yeah, I know it’s a pun, but do you think we on the mortal plane go to an “Earth spa,” demon??? c’mon).

Family Circus, 10/20/25

Normally, I would think the “parent makes a big show of teasing a kid when they do something good by implying that there’s something wrong with them” is not really the sort of thing you want to do if you’re really aiming to reinforce good behavior, but based on Jeffy’s face here, there’s no real danger of that, because that is one of the blankest expressions I’ve ever seen. No thoughts, only Jeffy. He is definitely not processing Ma Keane’s complicated little semiotic dance, which I guess is really just for her.