Archive: Phantom

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Herb and Jamaal, 9/28/06

Herb and Jamaal seems to be laboring under the misapprehension that Jamaal and Yolanda are the Ross and Rachel of the comics pages, and that America is on tenterhooks to see how their mutual but repeatedly thwarted romance, which has been drawn out for literally months and months, will turn out. Apparently the climactic moment has arrived in the form of this disturbing double entendre. I’m assuming that the original punchline involved the phrase “I’d toss your salad for you,” but the prudes at the syndicate cleaned it up.

Gil Thorp, 9/28/06

Who are these people? Don’t know. What’s the background to this little incident? Not a clue. Are they blowing up mailboxes? Yes, yes they are. And that frankly is all I need to know to know that Gil Thorp is awesome.

The Phantom, 9/28/06

So our old friend Walker has broken up a little human trafficking ring. Today, the Ghost-With-Stripy-Butt proves that just because you’re a superhero and defender of justice and human rights, doesn’t mean you can’t also be a condescending prick.

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Apartment 3-G, 9/11/06

Now, we all know that nothing good, and probably several things bad, will come of this, but, after all the time we’ve spent mocking Tommie for being boring and sexless and having no life and never ever getting any fun or attention from the Apartment 3-G creative team, let’s take a moment to stop making fun of her and savor the fact she’s at last having a good time.

OK, moment’s over. Say, where have we seen a picture like panel three recently?

Aagggh! Watch out for the tongue, Tommie, watch out for the tongue!

The Phantom, 9/11/06

Say what you will about the recently concluded Phantom tale of Chatu the shirtless terrorist, but at least it was reasonably easy to follow and involved the Phantom fighting bad guys. Last week’s Phantom strips featured an incomprehensible set up involving sinister businessmen and government corruption that would have been easier to follow had there been any indication as to what their business was or which government they were corrupting. Today, the Phantom proves his softness on white-collar crime by ignoring this backstory and deciding to work with Devil as some sort of human-canine tugboat replacement team. Apparently, when he’s bored, Mr. Walker becomes the Ghost-Who-Assists-With-Nautical-Safety-And-Maritime-Commerce. At least he’s not taking his cue from Spider-Man, because if he were, he’d be the Ghost-Who-Whines-At-The-TV.

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Shoe, 8/31/06

The punchline of this joke is at once bland, hackneyed, vaguely sexist, told better elsewhere, and immediately forgettable — classic Shoe, in other words. Of more interest to the comics student is Roz’s wide-eyed, head-bobbling reaction. She looks like the Perfersser just told her that the Health Department is planning to shut her diner down because of a psittacosis outbreak, not because she’s just been fed some dumb “male birds are from Mars, female birds are from Venus” shtick. (By the way, Perfesser, girl birds have feathers, not hair.) Is she not used to this sort of lameness? How long has she been in this damn strip?

The Phantom, 8/31/06

I have to admit to being a little dissapointed with the conclusion of this Phantom storyline, with the Ghost-Who-Yuks-It-Up-With-Midgets seeming pretty blasé about allowing Chatu the Shirtless Terrorist to escape and shirtlessly terrorize another day. Now we know that, for the Phantom, the big thrill is not bringing bare-torsoed ne’er-do-wells to justice, but instead setting things up so that you can really screw with their heads a few years down the line.

Luann, 8/31/06

Hey, everybody! The Toni and Brad Show’s back! Just like we’ve all been waiting for all this time! Right? Right?

Right?

[awkward silence]

In an effort to say something nice, I’ll say this: I like the way Reddy’s eyes are cast sarcastically to the right in the first panel. I’m imagining an elaborate series of electrodes attached to Brad’s ape-like mug so that the li’l safety robot can display a full panoply of lifelike facial expressions.

Mary Worth, 8/31/06

And heeeeere comes the bludgeoning.