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Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 11/8/15

Fun news! The current creative team behind Barney Google and Snuffy Smith has decided to dip into the strip’s long history and bring us a long-forgotten character: Granny Creeps, a black-clad crone who lives in a cave and performs mountain folk magic for community residents. This might give rise to intriguing plotlines about the very deep persistence of pre-Christian belief systems in rural, isolated communities, but as the punchline of today’s strip makes clear, Granny Creeps is as much a grifter and fraud as Hootin’ Holler’s supposed champion of monotheism.

Rex Morgan, M.D., 11/8/15

Hooray! Milton Avery, who is in fact ill, with debilitating dementia, of the sort that would prevent him from running a company, has managed to hold it together for the length of a board meeting, so he and his wife, who has no professional background in aerospace or spy satellites or lenses or whatever it is this company does, will continue to run it, rather than this nice Indian man who probably has some interesting ideas about new directions for the company and would at least carry on the tradition of cricket fandom in the corporate boardroom. Along the way, Milton has publicly humiliated his son, who has done nothing throughout this process but tell the truth about his father’s increasing incapacity and look out for the best interest of the company’s shareholders. Haha, remember Hugh’s last storyline, when everyone tried to gaslight him when he realized they were, in actuality, conspiring against him? Remember how his dad has been a monster to him for his entire life? Remember how he’s the bad guy in this storyline, for some reason?

Six Chix, 11/8/15

hey lady

EVERYONE CAN SEE AND HEAR YOU, NOT JUST THE DRONE

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Hi and Lois, 10/31/15

I’m gonna pass over the extremely half-assed costuming going on here (hey guys, zombies have rotting flesh and they don’t speak English, this is wholly inaccurate) and point out that Thirsty is looking pretty rough. Glowing nose, multi-day beard growth — and wouldn’t Irma normally be the one handing out candy? I’m assuming she left him and he’s been on a multi-day bender ever since.

Mark Trail, 10/31/15

Awwwwwwwwww yeah, another boat explosion in Mark Trail. That’s the stuff, baby. Keep it coming. Keep it coming.

Rex Morgan, M.D., 10/31/15

YEAH GOSH WHY WOULD THE HEAD OF SECURITY SIDE WITH HUGH INSTEAD OF MILTON

SO HARD TO FIGURE OUT

MAYBE IT’S BECAUSE MILTON IS VISIBLY NON COMPOS MENTIS AND HIS WIFE JUST CHANGED ALL THE COMPANY PASSWORDS, THROWING THE WHOLE BUSINESS INTO CHAOS

WHEREAS HUGH HAS THE BACKING OF THE COMPANY’S SHAREHOLDERS

I DUNNO, I’M JUST SPITBALLING HERE

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Six Chix, 10/18/15

While I cannot argue with the sentiment of today’s Six Chix, I am supremely unnerved by the context in which it is delivered. Why do these three women (or are they variously malformed instances of the same woman?) each appear to be accompanied by an ominous dark void? Is this some sort of dimensional portal from which the women are emerging, or some of the Monoliths from the 2001 series? Or perhaps they’re just large stakes to which the women have been tied, with burning in the immediate future. In today’s fashion-forward world, does a woman condemn herself as a witch merely for suggesting sensible shoes?

Rex Morgan, M.D., 10/18/15

Haha, Jordan is not happy to be the unwitting confidant of Milton’s senile, paranoid fantasies! Maybe he’s just going to have to explain to Heather about this frozen money, or maybe they are all going to be killed by Milton’s enemies, but either way, I bet he’s regretting turning down that gig as “guy who gives free stuff to the Morgans” and telling his agent he wanted a bigger role.