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Archive: Rex Morgan, M.D.

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Sorry, young people: You, personally, are responsible for Marvin now

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Marvin, 9/20/22

You know I am loath to say anything positive about the syndicated comic strip Marvin, but I have to say that I’m reasonably impressed that the strip is acknowledging that someone who is the parent of an infant and still in the early-to-mid stages of male pattern baldness is not, in fact, of an age to have attended Woodstock, or even Woodstock ’99, but rather would be one of those darn millennials we hear so much about on the news these days. By giving her husband’s exact age, Jenny really opens up a lot of information about his personality. Like, we’ve confirmed that, assuming we’re not dealing with some kind of Doogie Howser situation (and based on his demonstrate intellectual capabilities, I have zero reason to believe that we are), Jeff was in college at the earliest from 2005 to 2009, a full five years after “Who Let The Dogs Out” was released and a full four years and nine months after it had entirely worn out its welcome with literally everyone, meaning that he put it on that college mix CD as an ironic bit. He’s always been terrible, in other words, as further demonstrated by the fact that he’s now buying a turntable just so he can recreate that bit, which would’ve probably been only mildly annoying to the people in his dorm, for his family, who will absolutely hate him for it.

Rex Morgan, M.D., 9/20/22

Think about the stuff that we actually see in Rex Morgan, M.D. Can you imagine how boring this dude’s “story” must’ve been to just be completely elided between today’s strip and yesterday’s? Dude’s been grievously insulted by the narrative structure he’s embedded within, and he’ll never even know it.

The Lockhorns, 9/20/22

God damn it, Leroy is an obsessive Jets fan, not a Giant’s fan. Do I have to be the unpaid keeper of the lore for all of these strips now???

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That plane has no external markings so I assume they’re all being flow to a CIA black site for interrogation

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Rex Morgan, M.D., 9/19/22

Say what you will about the glacial pacing and low stakes of Rex Morgan, M.D., but the art in today’s strip really nails the facial expression any of us would have if a chatty stranger’s opening gambit on a multi-hour flight was “Wow, I’m sure sittin’ a lot closer to you that any of use would like, huh????” Unfortunately I fear the rest of the week will continue with this narrative vérité and really make us feel every moment of a conversation we don’t want to have but can’t escape.

Mary Worth, 9/19/22

Oh, you say you’re sick of strips about Dawn’s love life? How about strips about Mary and Jeff’s love life, huh? How about that? I actually do prefer these kinds of strips because whenever we revisit this couple’s relationship status, it’s always because Jeff is abruptly leaving town to fix cleft palates in developing countries or Mary is rejecting Jeff’s marriage proposals, so I say: BRING IT ON.

Marvin, 9/19/22

Wow, big news! The comic strip Marvin has finally come up with a recurring character trait for Jeff beyond “hates his son” and “hates his in-laws” and “not a big fan of his wife,” and it’s “loves the Baja Men.”

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Let’s get medieval all up in here

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Hagar the Horrible, 9/14/22

Feels like someone over at Walker-Browne Amalgamated Humor Industries LLC is trying to feed into my “when exactly in history does Hagar the Horrible take place” — and it’s working! So, some fun facts: England really did have a King Edgar, and he really did come to the throne as a scruffy teen. He became king in 959, though he succeeded his brother, not his father, who had died years earlier, and his coronation ceremony was devised by Saint Dunstan (a bishop, not an orangutang) and (topical!) is the basis for the ceremony still used by British monarchs to this day. His Wikipedia article claims that “Scandinavia was ‘largely quiescent’ during this period and Viking activity directed towards England was much reduced,” but we all know that records from this era are spotty, because it’s clear that he got his palace utterly plundered by Hagar fairly early in his reign.

Rex Morgan, M.D., 9/14/22

Sorry, it turns out we couldn’t squeeze much drama out of “Buck is in charge of an old person,” so instead we’ve got … these two! A boring teen and her single mom, whose latest romance fizzled in an extremely uninteresting way! Um. Tune in tomorrow when … hopefully Sarah has another head injury?

Pluggers, 9/14/22

Do … do pluggers think you’re supposed to type on your phone with your thumbs? And that having more thumbs would therefore be helpful? Because that would explain a lot (about why they’re bad at typing on their phones).