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Crankshaft, 11/25/20

Aw, look at Pam’s little smile in panel three! She’s like, “Normally Dad’s malapropisms make me cringe, but that one … that one’s OK.” She’s wrong, it’s not, it sucks just as bad as all the rest of them. She’s trapped in a horrible wordplay version of Stockholm Syndrome.

Mary Worth, 11/25/20

Tommy, no! Your descent into opioid-fueled madness began when you threw out your back lifting some heavy boxes! You’ve made so much progress — don’t fall back into addiction by eagerly volunteering to tempt fate just to impress Brandy or (even more pathetic) your boss!

Daddy Daze, 11/25/20

Today’s Daddy Daze dispenses with the pretense that the Daddy Daze baby is a “ba”-based interlocutor and shows us its reality for what it is: the Daddy Daze daddy just blathering baroque nonsense to nobody.

Slylock Fox, 11/25/20

I know I say a lot of Slylock Fox scenes have powerful “IT BEGINS” energy vis à vis the moment when the animals rise up to destroy human civilization and create the animal-ruled world where Slylock plies his trade as a detective, but you have to admit that the “IT BEGINS” energy in today’s strip is in fact extremely strong. Those birds are going peck that kid to death, then they’re going to eat the whole bag of birdseed, then they’re going to figure out how to run the birdseed factory, after pecking to death everyone who works there.

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Blondie, 11/20/20

I’m trying very hard to imagine what sort of elementary school curriculum might include the concept of a “horn of plenty”? An art history lesson on how a once commonplace object evolved into a standardized icon over the centuries, and has now become an almost entirely abstract symbol with no grounding in anybody’s day-to-day life, would be very interesting to me, though maybe a little heady for eight-year-olds. Meanwhile, what do you think is the most disturbing/hilarious part of Dagwood’s horn of plenty? A lotta people are going to pick the cooked lobster, which obviously isn’t going to keep very long unrefrigerated, but let’s not sleep on the hamburger that’s just kind of sitting on the table in front of everything else.

Slylock Fox, 11/20/20

You’re probably wondering: What relationship does this entirely mundane domestic scene have to the Slylock Fox world of sapient animal dominance? Well, my guess is that we’re seeing the early post-animalpocalypse period, when the remaining pockets of human survivors have been defeated and confined to restricted zones, only allowed out to forage for subsistence at strictly defined times. This lady’s family is too hungry to wait to get this month’s provisions in the house.

Family Circus, 11/20/20

Wow, looks like Ma and Pa Keane finally gave into BIG GOVERNMENT’S DESPOTIC FIRE CODES and put some smoke alarms in the house, probably because someone from CPS threatened to put their children into foster care if they didn’t, and the kids seemed a little too into the idea.

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Blondie, 11/16/20

I strongly agree with the consensus here: this is a disturbing daydream! I feel like I need to know more details in order to really gauge the contours of how disturbing it is, though. The “no doors” thing is the most disturbing part by far, and is the key to whole scenario. Like, did they just wake up there together with no way out, slowly coming to terms with the fact that they’re trapped with each other in some Sartre-esque office hell? Or were they dropped down into a roofless office from above, and expected to fight each other to the death for the amusement of a hooting crowd of spectators?

Slylock Fox, 11/16/20

The first time I commented on this strip, I had a lot of thoughts about how Max could maximize his fashion potential at this seaside wedding blowout. But this time around, all I could think was: Max, are you seriously considering upstaging the bride by wearing white? How dare you!

Dennis the Menace, 11/16/20

The most menacing thing here is how grateful the piggy bank looks for Dennis’s promise to never trade him in for a wallet (Dennis is definitely going to trade him in for a wallet).

Family Circus, 11/16/20

I’ve never fully understood what the deal is supposed to be with Jeffy, an actual toddler, wearing cuffed jeans and penny loafers around the house at all times, but I will say that the look is not improved by shirtlessness.

Dick Tracy, 11/16/20

Oh, by the way, Neo-Chicago is blanketed by drones allowing omnipresent, crystal-clear police surveillance of everyone at all times, just in case you were wondering!