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Hey all! Your comment of the week in a moment, but first: I saw some comments this week about a video ad that was causing the page to move around and make things more difficult to read and comment. I believe that I have successfully removed the ad that was causing the problem and now I’m experimenting with some other ads. You may need to shift-reload the page to see the new layout. If you’re still experiencing that problem, or encountering some new ones that you think arise from the ads, please let me know ASAP! And the way to let me know truly as soon as possible is to email me at bio@jfruh.com, not to post a comment about it.

And now, with that out of the way: your comment of the week!

“Ha ha, kids sure say the darnedest things! I mean, not today, obviously, but sometimes, yeah!” –pugfuggly

And your hilarious runners up!

“Hmmmm, a ‘baby,’ they say….nope, not ringing a bell.” –Tigernan Douglas Pournelle, on Facebook

“On 4th thought, people used to write directly to me at Gasoline Alley before they complicated addresses! They stopped writing when they had to add an extra 5 digits! When I finish wrapping up this mail bomb I’ll finally have my revenge on Mr. ZIP!” –nescio

“Her name is ‘Charlotte’. Her code name is ‘Sungirl 734’, but her handlers in the KGB just call her ‘Comrade Baby.’” –seismic-2

“Is there a way a reader could break through the wall and ask April what’s going on? Is she safe? Is the baby safe? Is she, in fact, a traitor? I already know everything I need to know about Randy.” –Northernlurker

“‘I do declare the very thought of Mr. Trail gives me the vapors,’ said Lesley, carefully angling herself toward the fainting couch her boss bought just for these occasions.” –Spunky The Wonder Squid

“I’m trying to decode the expression on the plugger’s face. Terror? Shame? Grim fascination? All three? ‘Please, God, say that came out of the car and not out of me!’” –Joe Blevins

“Jeez, creepy old man in Gasoline Alley. The kid is already unconscious. No need to throw shuriken at him. Good thing you have no depth perception or you might have hurt him like a mackerel, or those fish you caught.” –Voshkod

“Our culture is so obsessed with ancestral roots and pristine culture that there is little space for the experience of mixed children, who are under pressure to define a straightforward identity. This is heavy stuff from a strip all about shitting yourself.” –Ettore

“It’s a good thing Bill Watterson’s Calvin and Hobbes strip doesn’t still run in newspapers, or Sarah might realize that comic characters can actually have fun.” –BigTed

“I know there’s no dress code at a comic con, but Marianne is wearing a frumpy t-shirt, Cliff is dressed for his own funeral, and Conan is auditioning for the part of Arthur ‘the Fonz’ Fonzarelli in Happy Days: The Movie.” –Hogen the Mogen

“The Rise & Fall of Nazi Germany, by Mort Walker.” –Steve S

“I have to admire the Lt. Colonel for his commitment to following orders as the two officers walked silently from the office, checked out of their base, went to their respective houses, changed into civilian clothes, gathered their golf clubs from the garage, and awkwardly carpooled over to the golf course. ‘Any minute now,’ he thought, ‘He’ll order me to speak again and I can finally tell him about my views on central banks and how the country went straight to hell after we abandoned the gold standard.’” –Dread

“The man being pushed out the window represents the Patriarchy, which has been holding back the collective artists of the strip reaching their full potential these many years. The fact that it is sloppily drawn is ironic, for once.” –Rusty

“I’ll bet you dollars to donuts that Dithers and Bumstead buy their PJs at the same shop.” –DaveInPgh

“While Melvin’s commodity-dependent wealth scheme is certainly resistant to inflation, he should have proven oil reserves at a minimum if he’s going to vault into the world’s richest circle. And if he’s to out-compete Doc Ock’s tentacl.com, he’ll need some form of social media strategy as well. The ‘Moles Only’ site and a pocketful of stolen DeBeers’ property will get you nowhere.” –pastordan

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Spider-Man, 7/14/17

Hey, Spider-Man! Last I checked you and your movie star wife weren’t exactly supporting your aunt in the lifestyle to which she’d like to become accustomed in return for the fact that she raised you as a single parent after your negligence got her first husband killed, so maybe you should stop throwing roadblocks between her and her true love Mole-Man. Financial considerations shouldn’t keep people apart any more than the specious religious grounds you tried to use years ago. Anyway, that all turns out to not matter, because Mole-Man is rich! Rich as a mole! I sincerely love the Parker clan’s facial expressions in the last panel here: It’s as if they’re all holding extremely still, hoping that, if they don’t say anything or make direct eye contact with anybody, this whole “Mole-Man is fabulously wealthy and will soon be part of our family” thing will work out and none of them will ever have to work again.

Blondie, 7/14/17

OK, I rag on the syndicate colorists all the time for their egregious errors (like getting celebrities’ hair color wrong, just as an example) so I suppose I should give them credit when they deserve it: Mr. Dithers having a cash-green blanket to complement his currency-themed pajamas is a lovely and subtle touch.

Six Chix, 7/14/17

Here’s today’s Six Chix! It’s about, uh, straight-up murder, I guess?

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Crock, 7/13/17

For whatever reason Crock has spent a surprising amount of time of late following the unlikely bond between Otis, a human boy, and Wadsworth, a bird that eats rotting flesh. Today, though, we learn the limits of trans-species friendship. Amongst his own kind, Wadsworth would no doubt say, “Wait, Crock feeds his men food that’s already begun to decay, making it perfectly suited for my species’ uniquely evolved digestive tract? Well sign me the heck up! I like eating putrid meat! When we go into combat and massacre our enemies, leaving their bloated corpses on the desert battlefield, that’ll just be another great opportunity for met to feed!” But he knows this is a delicate topic amongst humans, and so he becomes self-conscious about sharing his thoughts with his friend.

Beetle Bailey, 7/13/17

Say what you will about General Halftrack’s increasingly obvious mental impairments, but at least he knows that it’s better to plot a coup during ostensible recreation hours rather than at his actual HQ.