The Comics Curmudgeon

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That bull sure has strong feelings about laziness (?)

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Slylock Fox, 2/17/23

From years of reading Slylock Fox together, we’ve come to understand that the world it depicts is one where the animals rose up against humans, exterminated most of them, and then went on to recreate human society the best they could, living in our cities, establishing political, legal, and economic structures that mimic our own, and so on. There’s been less attention spent on the animals’ cultural production, but here too we must assume that they’re following a human template, publishing animal-themed comics in animal-focused newspapers with punchlines that make animals laugh and make the few remaining humans go “Huh. Huh. Huh?”

Family Circus, 2/17/23

Look, Keane parents, you’ve lived with these children for several years now, and the fact that you’ve chosen to decorate your house with an endless expanse of pure white wall-to-wall carpet without regard for the very obvious consequences is entirely on you.

Mary Worth, 2/17/23

TIRED: Estelle keeps running into her ex, Wilbur, who she finds annoying
WIRED: Estelle, having succumbed to Wilburmadness, hallucinates her ex wherever she goes

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Robust oxy competition is good for consumers, honestly

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Mary Worth, 2/16/23

Look, I’m not going to say I’m done with Wilbur, like Estelle and Iris justifiably are, but I am a little sick of his shit, and feel like Mary Worth readers could use a rest from him for a while. That said, I do think today’s strip is a kind of fun meta-commentary, like “Oh, did you you think you had finally achieved inner peace, NOPE, SORRY WILBUR”

Hagar the Horrible, 2/16/23

We all remember the Ice Bucket Challenge … now get ready for the Ice Bucket Fetish!

Judge Parker, 2/16/23

So wait, you’re telling me that Cavelton had an oxy ring run by drug dealers, and another one run by the cops, and another one run by a judge? Sure explains why everyone has been so loopy around here.

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Love the headband, I hope Leroy announced that he was about to “get physical”

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Dennis the Menace, 2/15/23

I know the intended reading here is that Dennis is asking Mr. Wilson, who doesn’t like kids now, whether he (Mr. Wilson) liked kids when he was himself a kid. But they bolded one instead of were at the end of the question, which totally changes the meaning! If Dennis actually said this aloud with that emphasis, he’d be asking whether Mr. Wilson liked kids when he was one year old, specifically. And look, I’m no child development expert, but I’m pretty sure most one year olds barely know what other kids are and don’t really have strong opinions on them. Mr. Wilson at age one probably liked having a nipple in his mouth and an absence of sudden loud noises, and that’s a comprehensive list.

The Lockhorns, 2/15/23

I know Loretta being dissatisfied with Leroy’s earning power is one of the core jokes of this strip, but they’ve always been depicted as living in a decently sized suburban home, so I have to assume that Leroy’s decision to do his workout routine immediately behind the living room couch where Loretta is trying to entertain company is a deliberate and aggressive choice. I’m not sure if he’s trying and failing to impress this woman with his physical prowess, or if he’s aiming this behavior and Loretta and it boils down to the buch more basic “God, I hate my wife! Oh, is she not paying attention to me? We’ll fuckin’ see about that.”

Gasoline Alley, 2/15/23

A couple days ago, National Book Award winner and Pulitzer Prize nominee Joyce Carol Oates tweeted inquisitively about the comic strip Gasoline Alley, becoming the latest in a series of high-profile cultural commentators who are stealing my bit. Anyway, I hope her interest carried through till today, because I think she’d be quite intrigued to learn that the current storyline is about a little boy who’s about to freeze to death in the woods.