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That’s right folks: next Friday is the 2nd Friday of the month, and you know what that means: LIVE ON-STAGE COMEDY IN LOS ANGELES, FROM YOURS TRULY!

Here is the Facebook event! Go forth and proclaim your allegiance to me and my stable of laffmasters!

To tide you over until then, though, you’re going to have to enjoy this comment of the week:

“‘I’m gonna spend the whole summer working more hours!’ ‘Good call.’ Sheesh. It’s like reading Goofus and Gallant, the Oops! All Gallant version.” –Peanut Gallery

Also enjoy your hilarious runners up!

“You’re a plugger if your wife’s stomach growls but you can’t hear it over the sound of gravel tumbling around inside her gizzard.” –nescio

“Is the guy in the van a full-fledged dog trafficker or did he just spot Greta and think, ‘Hey! A dog wearing a bowtie! I want it!’” –Weaselboy

“The pseudo-cannibalism of Shoe might be believable if the birds were defined as hawks. But the disillusioned characters have nothing of a predator’s spirit.” –Tonio

“In Dennis the Menace God’s grace comes from faith rather than works, as the light shines on the child who expresses the power of prayer even as his deeds seem evil in all other respects. In the second panel of Shoe God turns his back on the entire world, which completely deserves it.” –matt w

“It was only years later, as Elmo’s brain filled almost to the point of insanity, that it occurred to him that Mr. Bumstead’s slogan was only a pious invocation of civic religion, rather than a strict commandment.” –I’m Not Cthulhu, But I Play Him On TV

“So are these Milford girls employing some Gregg Hamm Techniquee (sic)? Because they seem to be fighting with their eyes closed. And recovering with their eyes closed. It really does tend to highlight their lovely eyelashes, but morale could better, it seems.” –made of wince

“‘I enjoy seeing the jealous faces of old men as they imagine us fucking’ said a character in a daily newspaper comic strip, apparently.” –pugfuggly

“Was there ever any explanation for what happened to Bunny, Beetle’s previous girlfriend? I’m guessing the artists got tired of having to remember which of the two young woman models to refer to. Every few seconds count when tee-time is approaching.” –Rube

“Y’know, I’m with Chunkhead on this one. You’re wearing a nylon trash bag on your body and a piece of cardboard on your head, both of which have been worn by hundreds of sweaty, hormonal teens/young adults, and frankly, no thank you. Poindexter may know the history of why we’ve done a thing for about a thousand years, but look at that haircut; that guy’s been in high school since the ’50s, he probably thinks Headband over there spends all her days in Home Ec, learning how to make pot roast for the fellas. (Yes, I realize I could look up their names. No, I will not look up the name of anyone who graces the panels of Rex Morgan, M.D., and this includes the titular character, whatever the fuck his name is.)” –els

“She sat as still as a statute, watching the little homunculus jabber about homework. They had warned her about bad trips, but nothing had really prepared her. Avoid the brown acid, she said to herself as the bookcase began to melt and the gremlin’s head began to rotate.” –Voshkod

“Kelly is gazing at Buzzcut as if a Poindexter with an Adam’s apple and a deep trove of historical trivia is a sex god. That’s not the way I remember high school, and I should know.” –Artist formerly known as Ben

“Knowing the History Channel, Grandpa is either a Nazi or an Ancient Alien. Both would explain a lot.” –Ettorre

“What an absolutely bizarre choice for expression and pose on the part of the artist. ‘Booyah, who’s watching TV? I’M watching TV!!!’” –ectojazzmage

Remember: If you want an ad-free version of this site sent to you every day via email, for $3 a month you can become a Comics Curmudgeon newsletter subscriber! And if you never want to see banner ads on this site, and want to get cool comment-editing features to boot, for the same low price you can become a Comics Curmudgeon website subscriber! And if you just want to give me money directly, you can put some scratch in my tip jar, or back me on Patreon! Thanks to all for your support and readership!

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Family Circus, 6/2/23

Nextdoor, the social network that’s like Facebook except instead of people who you actually like or at least know it’s full of people who happen to live near you, isn’t exactly a hotbed of positivity, but last summer, a nice lady posted a comment along the lines of “I’ve really been noticing the new trend of shorter shorts on men, and I just want to tell the gentlemen in the neighborhood who are partaking: I see you and I appreciate you.” I had just gone in for some shorter new J. Crew stretch chinos myself, and I have to wonder: was she talking about me? I guess I’ll never know, but I’d like think so. But none of us hipsters could hold a candle to Billy’s coach here, who quite clearly was drawn in another decade altogether. What do you think the original caption to this one was? I’m thinking “Can we delay the start of the game, Coach? My dad has to smoke an entire pack of cigarettes and also doesn’t want to hang out with me.”

Rex Morgan, M.D., 6/2/23

Look, non-union Jughead equivalent: I’m not going to say I’m happy that Funky Winkerbean was finally put out to pasture, but I am frankly glad to no longer be thinking about convoluted comic strip timelines, so you can just keep your theories to yourself, buddy.

Marvin, 6/2/23

Wow, grandpa looks smug as hell! Not sure if that means that he is on the History Channel or he isn’t, but either way it’s an unpleasant vibe.

Mary Worth, 6/2/23

Damn you, Lyle Lovett! You’d better not eat that dog!

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Rex Morgan, M.D., 6/1/23

Many, many years ago, God, so many years ago, what have I done with my life, is this all there is … wait, what was I talking about? Oh, right! Niki first showed up in this strip in the mid-’00s, which in the grand scheme of things really wasn’t very long ago at all, when you think about it, and back then he was a little punk with a weird star-shaped haircut and a troubled home life, and who wasn’t above doing a little light erotic banter with either June or Rex if that’s what it took to climb Glenwood’s socioeconomic ladder. And what would that skinny kid think of the hunky young man before us in today’s strip, who has respectable hair and thinks it’s a little “funny” for a guy to wear graduation robes? Those things are a bit too much like dresses, you know what I’m saying? Why can’t we all just wear sensible black polo shirts, the preferred garment of normal teenagers?

Marvin, 6/1/23

My least favorite aspect Marvin is obviously all the pissing and shitting jokes, but another thing about it I don’t love is that the strip refuses to settle on a specific age for the title character. Is he a baby? Is he a toddler? Can he talk in a way that adults understand? Is he in day care? School? Does he have homework? Can any of these life phases be reconciled with the fact that he still pisses and shits himself on the regular? Because, to be clear, he definitely still pisses and shits himself on the regular and he will never stop.