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Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 10/3/21

For a brief moment, Snuffy realizes that he’s harvesting worms that he’ll use to catch fish that he’ll presumably eat, which is a little too close to productive economic activity for comfort! Fortunately, he soon turns the whole exercise into yet another opportunity to further drain his household’s rapidly diminishing resources, which is much more his speed.

Dustin, 10/3/21

I’ve gotta say, I do enjoy the few Dustins that don’t focus on the strip’s generation-war shtick. Today there’s no hint of conflict between Dustin and his dad, just a young man giving in to heavy-lidded bliss at the thought that soon he’ll be devoured by this pack of hungry raccoons and all his troubles will be over.

Panel from The Lockhorns, 10/3/21

Leroy retreats to his mind palace, imagining watching the news with his wife and seeing yet another coastal city flooded by a category 5 Hurricane Loretta, the fifth storm with that name this year. “That’s what the mall looks like when you’re done with it,” he says, as scenes of ruined homes and stores flash on the screen. And she can’t do anything about it! It’s the World Meteorological Organization in Geneva, Switzerland, that’s naming them, not him!

Panel from Slylock Fox, 10/3/21

I’m sorry, Cassandra is a cat burglar and also an actual cat, so no, I don’t think she’s going to sheepishly reappear in the lobby once she realizes she got in an elevator that only goes up. She’ll be climbing down the side of the building within minutes, or maybe just leaping from rooftop to rooftop to make her escape. The only “error” she’s made is getting those severe bangs.

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Mary Worth, 10/2/21

[At the wedding] “So she said to me, ‘Is that your Frenchie?’” [leers grotesquely, everyone is kind of uncomfortable] “And I said ‘Yes. They’re cute, aren’t they? Except for the…” [really unsettlingly long pause, leers even more grotesquely, everyone waits for it, not really sure what “it” is going to be] “CHEWING!’” [disgust rises, nobody can quite put their finger on what he’s getting at here or what this double entendre is but they can all agree it’s very gross] [there’s no cute Pierre accent jokes in this one, he’s run far, far away at this point]

Hi and Lois, 10/2/21

I love the way the first panel here emphasizes the difference in height between our two mismatched best buds. It’s as if Hi is trying to physically intimidate Thirsty into finally, after literal decades, embracing the craft brew revolution. Sorry, Hi! The whole point is to drink the beers as quickly as possible to get buzzed as quickly as possible, and you can’t do that if you have taste it.

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October is upon us, folks, and you know what that means: Chunky sweaters, pumpkin spice in everything, and your comment of the week on Friday, just like every other time of year:

“Wait — the closest Beetle Bailey has gotten to actual war is war games. Are they using real bullets now? As a taxpayer, I should object, but if one hits Chip Gizmo, I’ll let it slide.” –Pozzo

And your runners up are also fall-tastic!

“I appreciate that there’s a ‘Camp Swampy Bugle‘ sign right behind Rocky’s head because I can only assume before they did that Halftruck would wander into random buildings and yell at whoever was there.” –Tabby Lavalamp

“Yes, Rocky is Beetle Bailey’s resident rebel due to his uh … name and hair, I guess? But black pompadour or no, he must refer to his superior as ‘sir.’” –Irrischano

“Say what you want about Dithers, but he doesn’t give himself some fancy desk chair he wouldn’t also buy for his employees. And that’s in spite of how a nice chair might help with the constant discomfort caused by his terrifying stumpy little baby legs. If it’s good enough for his human-legged workers, it’s good enough for him.” –Dan

“I have long admired Dagwood for continuing to wear a tuxedo to work every day since the 1930s long after the joke stopped making sense. I also admire him for writing his contracts with either a pen or a pencil instead of some kind of word processing software, keeping up another habit from the 1930s. His dedication is highlighted by the presence of a monitor on his desktop that must serve as a paperweight of some sort. Hang in there, Dag! Don’t let that blasted 21st century push you around!” –Larry McAwful

“Pluggers are old and weak, and also carry around a lot of crap. It’s sad.” –pugfuggly

“Okay, I’m a little slow, but I just realized the function of Wilbur in Mary Worth: to keep Mary humble. After all, when you constantly create romances, save marriages, and heal trauma with your advice, you need a reminder that not every problem can be solved with your wisdom and platitudes. Advise an older woman that dating a younger man is acceptable, and Wilbur will end up on a cruise dating the dance instructor before getting scammed. Suggest to a lonely older man that a pet is a good way to improve your social life, and Wilbur will go and adopt a dog hoping to ‘pick up chicks.’ Even Wilbur’s job — an advice columnist — makes a twisted mockery of Mary’s noble calling. Wilbur is the Harriet to Mary’s Emma, the Fool to Mary’s Lear, the eternal corrective to Mary’s tendency to pridefulness. In short, it’s our duty as an audience to enjoy watching Wilbur suffer, for only thus can Mary realize the limits to her own power of meddling.” –Thelonius_Nick

“I guess we know why Skyler hasn’t been seen in Shoe lately, child (fledgling?) protective services removed him from a plainly unsanitary living situation.” –ArtOfWargames, on Twitter

“I’ve finally figured it out: Dagwood’s neck is a flesh-colored coiled spring. Someday it’s going to get stretched out and Dagwood’s head will be bobbing around like a broken jack-in-the-box, at least a foot above his body, while he desperately tries to finish snarfing his final sandwich.” –made of wince

“Ten thousand yards uprange, the Lockheed Martin executives and the Generals shook hands. The tech demo was good. The food-seeking micro-missiles would be a line item in the next DoD appropriations bill. Sure, they’d never be used in battle, but as long as the executives got a big raise, and the Generals were all in line to become executives when they retired, everyone was happy. Downrange, PFC Bailey’s blood pooled on the floor of the mess tent.” –Voshkod

“Rarely has Rex been so wrong. Reading your own published work can only result in regret. ‘Look at all the typos. This sequence makes no sense. What idiot wrote this?’” –KevinR

“I interpret Godiva’s self-pointing gesture as an infuriated response to instruction from the director. ‘You want me to make my top even more precarious? This top?!’” –Violet

“‘Ford’s Theatre… Don’t we risk altering history?’ ‘We must! Netflix is eager for new content and we can earn big bucks with a recording of Our American Cousin! For some reason, I can’t find a modern production willing to stage it again.’” –Ettorre

“So there’s evidently a stadium full of spectators — you can see the umbrellas! — sitting out in the dark, in the rain, watching this lone 70-ish woman dance around the center of the field in a storm. After she’s hauled off in a stretcher, maybe they can all go home and dry off.” –Handsome Harry Backstayge, Idol of a Million Other Women

“Just what is the dress code situation at Diet Smith’s lab? Smith himself wears a suit, since he’s the boss, but the other employees are all over the place. One dresses like a UPS guy, plus there’s a lady in a lab coat (because science). Then there’s a third guy wearing what seems to be a suit with a bowtie — conservative enough, but he has the spiky hair and oversized sunglasses of a 1980s advertising mascot. If you ever want to be taken seriously in the mad science game, Smith, I want to see some uniformity among your henchpeople.” –Joe Blevins

“Dagwood’s shocked expression seems a bit much in reaction to a decent but not great joke. Is it because the setup-punchline structure of what he thought was a normal neighborly conversation has torn away the veil of his apparent suburban realm to reveal his life as a simulacrum in which he is an unknowing player for our prurient entertainment? As everything solid melts into air, is his only thought really ’75 bucks? That’s a lot for some shitty electric screwdriver’?” –Lawyerbob

“Wilbur may not look like the peak of human athletic prowess, but at maximum frolicking velocity he is the fastest land animal on Earth. You can hide, Pierre, but you cannot run.” –jroggs

“On the one hand, that’s a pretty dope goldfish. On the other hand … what? He doesn’t … he doesn’t ‘really’ talk? Does he do something similar to talking that you can’t categorize as ‘really’ talking? Is that what the bubbles are supposed to be? Is that where, Dennis, you get the impression that this creature wishes to verbally communicate with you? Is there actually a joke here? Whose fish is this? And why is a fish this gigantic in a bowl this small? Ketcham and associates, why have you done this to me?” –els

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