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Comics archive! Barney Google & Snuffy Smith

Bird poop isn’t supposed to be that color, right

Six Chix, 5/22/15

So, wait … is the turtle on the right a “drama queen” because it pulled its head into its shell for protection as inky black bird feces rained down from above? Or is the turtle on the left just the type to blame others for whatever misfortune befalls them? I genuinely will be puzzling over the meaning of this bizarre, grotesque cartoon all weekend, thanks a lot.

Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 5/22/15

Oh, man, Lukey’s crumpled face in panel two kind of kills me. “He’s right! I’m a flawed and fundamentally unlovable person, and soon everyone’s going to know the truth about how bad I am!”

This could just be a transparent vegetable-eating dodge

Gil Thorp, 5/21/15

Oh, hey, what’s going in baseball season in Gil Thorp? Well, it seems that football superstar/baseball dilettante True Standish was goofing around during a Mudlark loss, because football is a serious sport for real men and baseball is silly game you play when it’s nice out so why bother taking it seriously, enraging actual baseball player Max Ortiz. This is an interesting variation on the typical Gil Thorp storyline, which usually involves players all too intensely dedicated to their sport of choice, but at least we have one comforting narrative element to grasp on to: Coaches Thorp and Kaz remaining roughly twenty feet away from any brewing conflict and deciding to “let the guys police themselves.”

Family Circus, 5/21/15

Ma Keane’s biggest dream was that her kids might become slightly less moronically literal-minded once they learned to read. Today, that hope has been tragically dashed.

Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 5/21/15

Aww, how romantic! Grampy and Granny are going to spend their anniversary shitting!

“CLEAN YOUR PLATE, CLEAN YOUR PLATE” the other adults cruelly chant

Family Circus, 5/17/15

That’s actually a fairly accurate visualization of the new Orion space capsule, Jeffy! I guess all that promotion NASA did on Sesame Street was money well spent. PJ, meanwhile, has the true mind of a child here: a child who has no control over what he eats and has to choke down whatever his parents put in front of him, and who dreams of revenge.

Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 5/17/15

Hootin’ Holler may be cut off from the benefits of modern society, such as electricity and running water, but is also insulated from some 21st century ills. “Of course thar’s a lot of news in the newspaper! That’s how it works!!” exclaims Snuffy, blissfully unaware of USA Today, network morning TV news shows, and BuzzFeed listicles.