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Comics archive!
Spider-Man
Blondie, 7/16/10
Now that they’ve finally mastered texting technology, Blondie and the mailman will have a much easier time conducting their affair.
Spider-Man, 7/16/10
“I mean, fleeing like a coward the moment things get difficult is really much more my shtick.”
Dennis the Menace, 7/16/10
This is actually news that Mr. Wilson will enjoy hearing, considering the Post Office’s policy of only putting people on stamps after they’ve died.
Herb and Jamaal, 7/16/10
HA HA HA HERB’S DAUGHTER YOUR GOD HAS FAILED YOU — NOW IT IS TIME TO TURN TO SATAN
Mark Trail, 7/7/10
Mark Trail’s drawings of wildlife are generally quite good, if dubiously colored, but domestic animals are often depicted as mutants almost as bizarre-looking as some of the people. Still, by the standards of the strip that dog in the foreground of panel two is pretty good. His expression has been well captured, assuming that expression is meant to indicate something along the lines of “Oh, yeah, that ‘sweet little thing’ you brought home? I ate it. I’m not particularly sorry about it, either.”
Spider-Man, 7/7/10
Is this entire storyline going to consist of Iron Man’s rampages interrupting Peter Parker’s naps? I guess the writers have finally hit upon the thing that would most spur Spider-Man to action.
Family Circus, 7/7/10
Ha, ha! Jeffy thinks he’s capable of learning how to read!
Spider-Man, 7/1/10
I’ve never been on board an airplane that explosively depressurized due to a superhero cutting open the fuselage and flying out, but if I were, I’d imagine that, in my helplessness, I would actively refuse to look at the gaping maw in the side of the plane, as if that would cause it to no longer exist. If everyone else on board took the same attitude, then nobody would notice how exactly said hole would magically be filled in, and once it was fixed, we’d probably all forget about it and just return to our seats in an orderly fashion. Say, has this Georgia O’Keeffe-inspired webbing sculpture always been here? I didn’t notice it when I came on board. Must have missed it, somehow.
Dick Tracy, 7/1/10
So Dick Tracy’s current storyline, which I won’t even bother trying to explain, has ended as they all do: with a fresh corpse lying in a rapidly spreading pool of blood. This particular variation on the theme is noteworthy primarily because Dick is so gobsmacked at being rescued by Anja Nu, who, though somewhat monomaniacal about her play, we’ve had no reason to think of as being on anything other than the side of good. I guess Dick is just generally shocked at any act of kindness on anyone’s part. Maybe her “good reason” is that she just likes killing people, Dick! Surely you’d understand that.
Funky Winkerbean, 6/23/10
So why did Funky bravely step back from the precipice of alcoholism last week? Obviously it was so that, when he was inevitably killed by a distracted driver on his way home, he wouldn’t even have the sweet taste of liquor on his tongue to console him in his final moments. BONUS MISERY: Someone will have spotted him coming out of the bar, and everyone will assume that he drunk-drove himself to death, bringing shame to his family and his memory.
Luann, 6/23/10
Accidental Gunther nudity: totally predictable. Gunther’s three-foot long ribbed worm-cock: not predictable at all, and really quite unsettling.
Panel from Spider-Man, 6/23/10
Peter Parker: Portrait of a hero!
Hi and Lois, 6/15/10
I will admit that, weak little bit of 1950s-era wordplay though it is, the fact that Hi and Thirsty’s employer is named “Foofram Industries” or whatever amuses me. However, before today’s strip, I had always just assumed that the company was some generic and modest white collar concern. This strip seems to indicate that, even before this planned merger, Foofram is corporate giant, with employees filling two skyscrapers, one of which is decorated with the enormous word FOOFRAM, proudly proclaiming the founder’s name to pedestrians below and to the Fooframers in the other tower. (Do you think that both buildings have FOOFRAM signs, so that employees in both buildings are constantly reminded of the man to whom they owe fealty?) Anyway, I think at this point it goes without saying that I hope that the post-merger combined company keeps the Foofram name. It’s a very strong brand!
Beetle Bailey, 6/15/10
Although its only the shoe-chewing whose aftermath we see, the “mess” in “mess up his floor” is clearly code for peeing and/or defecating. And yet Otto is wearing undershorts! Is Sarge so dim as to think that wearing pants magically potty-trains a creature? Because it doesn’t, Sarge. Just think of how full those boxers must be! Sarge is a terrible pet owner! No wonder Otto looks so sad.
Spider-Man, 6/15/10
Oh, look, it’s a set-up for one of the very worst kinds of Spider-Man plot developments (yes, there are worst kinds): some pointless thing sends Peter Parker into a downward spiral of inadequacy and sullenness vis-à-vis his relationship with his wife and his perceptions of his own masculinity. Whee! We’ll have much time to dwell on this, but for the moment I just want to point out that both Parkers are !ing in panel three, which I find cute.
Spider-Man, 6/11/10
Just as Spider-Man the character within the Spider-Man newspaper strip is a pathetic failure at whatever he attempts, so too is the Spider-Man strip itself! For instance, surely one of the whole purposes for its existence (somewhere on the list below “entertain millions of readers around the country,” something else it doesn’t do properly) is to help build awareness of and affection for the Spider-Man brand, along with the brands of other major characters and properties owned by Marvel and its corporate parent, Disney. Thus, you’d expect that the strip would be tasked to do its small part to add to the marketing blitz for the Iron Man sequel, the release date of which was presumably set months if not years in advance. But it turns out that on May 7, the day Iron Man 2 hit movie theaters nationwide, Peter was being wowed by his wife’s ability to operate a camera. No, the Spider-Man strip is only jumping into the game five weeks later, because doing anything better than a half-assed job at anything would be wholly incongruent with the strip’s general vibe of ineptitude.
Blondie, 6/11/10
I would argue that the less Blondie does to draw attention to the Bumsteads’ bizarre living-room layout, the better. Still, I suppose this strip — in which Dagwood, tired of staring numbly at a screen while his wife faces away from him, tries and fails to figure out a more amenable position for the two of them — is some kind of coded story about their fading sex life.