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Panels from Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 2/16/25

Now, I joke a lot that the only real industries in Hootin’ Holler are moonshining, chicken theft, and (Doc Pritairt only) Medicaid fraud. However, obviously it’s realistic that some of its inhabitants toil in the dirty and dangerous extractive industries that power the flatlanders’ cities. A few dare to dream of ascending to management positions, only to be laughed at for their rustic diction by the city slickers until they give up. You can understand why Snuffy and Lukey don’t even bother trying!

Panel from Slylock Fox, 2/16/25

Today’s strip offers some interesting insight into the question of why humans as a species haven’t been exterminated altogether in the post-animalpocalypse world, and are even still legally allowed to own pets: animals may have occupied most important social roles, but the remaining veterinarians are still necessary to treat their new overlords’ health problems, at least until enough animals get through the new medical schools. But until then, the vet offices are still open and very necessary. Look at poor Max! He’s very sick, or possibly very high, and either way is in dire need of medical attention.

Judge Parker, 2/16/25

OK, very little about the backstory of Judge Parker that’s lead to this moment is believable, and it’s also not particularly believable that Sophie would use her family turning to her for her superhacking skills into an excuse to do a bunch of emotional processing, but you know what is honestly believable? Referring to Randy Parker as “Sam’s friend.” Like, yes, I’ve been writing about Sophie since (gulp) 2006, but in the world of the strip, she’s literally a teenager, and Randy is just some guy her adoptive dad hangs out with occasionally and is fundamentally not interesting or relevant to her life most of the time. And good for her! He’s not that interesting to me, honestly!

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Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 2/15/25

Hey, here’s a fun fact for you: did you know that ventriloquists don’t “throw” their voices anywhere? They just learn to speak with their mouths closed while working a puppet to match their speech, which creates the illusion that the voice is coming from elsewhere, because our sense of vision is much more precise than our sense of hearing and we tend to lock on to the moving puppet and assume that’s where the sound is coming from (and it’s generally not too far from the puppeteer anyway). Advanced practitioners can alter their voice to be softer so it seems to be coming from far away, but nobody can actually make it sound like it’s coming from a completely different direction. And yet there are so many comics and cartoons that imply otherwise! Much like this one! I attribute it to comics and ventriloquism emerging from the same milieu of popular entertainment and so cartoonists felt they would be violating kayfabe if they let on how it worked, but it’s also possible they didn’t know either because you couldn’t just look stuff up on Wikipedia back then, and now we’re stuck with the tropes. Anyway, my point is that as a child, I, like I assume many of you, had wildly incorrect ideas about ventriloquism, so thanks a lot, comics. And don’t even get me started on quicksand!

Heathcliff, 2/15/25

Oh, are you saying a robot and a cat can’t be friends, Grandpa Nutmeg??? I guess this really is the last acceptable prejudice, huh. (Not going into the details of what “this” might refer to, please write some fanfic about it if it interests you.)

Dennis the Menace, 2/15/25

I’m not sure what exactly Dennis is blathering on about — like is he saying that he did a bunch of sins over the past week because he hadn’t heard the good news about how he shouldn’t or something, maybe? — but I don’t actually think that’s important, because he’s only talking to distract the minister so he can get close enough to deliver a solid punch to the nuts. And the minister knows it! That’s good defensive use of the Holy Bible there, rev, I know they don’t teach that at seminary, you learned it from hard experience.

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The Lockhorns, 2/12/25

Inexpensive compared to what, Leroy? Eating at a “nice” restaurant? It still is! Eating at home? It never was! No, you’ve just decided to make Loretta feel bad because she begged to go out to eat somewhere, anywhere for once. Isn’t it cruel enough that you’re forcing her to split a single order of fries with you? Why can’t you be more like the guy in the background, who sincerely appreciates all the fast food industry’s deep bench of food scientists have done in terms of creating meal-like experiences suffused with the proper combinations of chemicals to activate the exact same part of your brain that reacts to cocaine?

Dennis the Menace, 2/12/25

Normally I’m not a fan of the “Dennis shit-talks his mom’s cooking” strips, but I gotta admit he’s really selling it here. That’s the face a guy with a mouthful of sawdust. That’s the face a guy who hasn’t tasted anything other than sawdust in years.

Pluggers, 2/12/25

Either pluggers swap sexual partners so often they can no longer be bothered to keep track of their fuckbuddies’ names, or they’re suffering from some kind of tragic brain ailment that’s causing early onset dementia. I leave it up to you to decide which possibility is more disturbing.

Mary Worth, 2/12/25

“I am now that Jared has pointed out that ‘Dirk’ rhymes with ‘jerk’! That’s a great mnemonic to remind me that he’s a jerk! Usually I just see his pretty eyes and beefy forearms and forget.”

Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 2/12/25

Ha ha, it’s funny because everyone in town knows that Snuffy is a financial, legal, and emotional burden on all of his loved ones!