Archive: Curtis

Post Content

Curtis, 9/19/24

Derrick and Onion are canonically the bullies in Curtis, but their game has been slipping for a long time. Way back in ’06 they were hard-core car thieves, but their malfeasance dwindled into vaguely threatening confrontations in school hallways accompanied by labored “Yo Mama” insults. Onion lost his trademark (“Onion”) quotation marks around 2016 and honestly hasn’t been entirely himself since. Tuesday we learned his given name is Norman, which doesn’t carry quite the same panache.

Now Derrick and Onion are in Mrs. Nelson’s class along with Curtis, assaulting the poor woman with flowers, candy, and honeyed words. Is this a redemption story, in which the two Learn the Error of Their Ways? A Josh-infuriating trauma plot, with a Big Reveal about the characters’ Painful Past that Explains Everything? A long con, as Curtis suspects? Or, intriguingly, one of those postmodern reframings of evidence that was right before our eyes the whole time, revealing Curtis as the real bully? I bet Curtis’s brother Barry would like to weigh in on that last one.

Dennis the Menace, 9/19/24

Oh, speak of the devil low-ranking demon, here he is with his familiar, Hot Dog. Wikipedia correctly pegs Hot Dog as “rarely seen.” He doesn’t have the personality of the Mitchell’s dog Ruff, and mostly just sits there in a lump with a smug expression on his face. So how would Mr. Wilson know he doesn’t do anything he doesn’t want to do? Maybe he just assumes that about cats, based on his observations of Heathcliff and Garfield.

Gasoline Alley, 9/19/24

What I love about Gasoline Alley is Jim Scancarelli’s art: the guy’s an old-school natural, and so long as he doesn’t try to get all photorealistic on us, there’s an easy elegance to his work that takes me back to when newspaper comics were a Big Deal and worthy of craft (cf. L’il Abner, Out Our Way, Pogo, Steve Canyon, many more). And it’s charming when Scancarelli gets locked in on something he clearly wants to draw, like a locomotive or today’s World’s Most Adorable Water Heater. Just look at that thing: lovingly rendered hot and cold water lines (copper, no PEX for 18″ ’cause it’s gas), corrugated vent duct shared with the chimney flue no backdrafting here no siree, igniter access panel, overflow pipe, inspection tag, for Pete’s sake! There’s even an International Residential Code-compliant stand to protect against ignition of flammable vapors. But what does that sucker hold, maybe two quarts?

It almost makes up for the cutesy animals and Joel’s lame pun.

Baby Blues, 9/19/24

Zoe turns the tables on the old “just wait ’til you have kids” trope: sour grapes for Wanda!

Crankshaft, 9/19/24

Crankshaft joins Arctic Circle in the Ain’t-It-Awful Hall of Fame.


—Uncle Lumpy

Post Content

Curtis, 8/6/24

Oh, you don’t think Curtis is cyber-savvy? Well, have you ever seen anyone post on a social media … in trinary numbers before?

Gasoline Alley, 8/6/24

“Anonymous,” huh? Wait a minute…

OH MY GOD

Gil Thorp, 8/6/24

Hey guys, you wanna see a guy hitting a golf ball? Today’s Gil Thorp is for you, my friends!

Bizarro, 8/6/24

What if an ape … wanted to have a job? Really makes you think, huh?

Post Content

Mark Trail, 8/3/24

Bill, I know you’re very busy with all the jobs the editor of a modern 21st century publication like Woods and Wildlife has to handle (mostly working on greenwashing sponcon articles extolling the environmental bona fides of the United Arab Emirates’ state-owned oil company), but Mark is not making a pun! He’s playing off the polysemy of a single word, not using a word that sounds like another word! Your editorial staff would be ashamed, if you hadn’t replaced them with the Grammarly browser plug-in.

Curtis, 8/3/24

The Curtis summer storyline is about how Curtis got a job at a local florist shop, which he likes, except the shop is going to close down soon because it’s not doing well financially, and its owners are going to move back to England, where they’re from. It’s been pretty boring so far, and I wasn’t really interested in it, until today, when I learned that the store parrot wants the store to fail, and is blocking innovative new revenue ideas to ensure that happens, and now I am locked in.

Marvin, 8/3/24

Good news, everyone! Marvin characters are starting to be haunted by the spectre of death! I certainly hope this trend soon starts to move in on the strip’s more prominent characters, who I’ve gotten to know and really dislike over the years.