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Archive: Daddy Daze

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Lift from the knees, Tommy! The KNEES!

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Crankshaft, 11/25/20

Aw, look at Pam’s little smile in panel three! She’s like, “Normally Dad’s malapropisms make me cringe, but that one … that one’s OK.” She’s wrong, it’s not, it sucks just as bad as all the rest of them. She’s trapped in a horrible wordplay version of Stockholm Syndrome.

Mary Worth, 11/25/20

Tommy, no! Your descent into opioid-fueled madness began when you threw out your back lifting some heavy boxes! You’ve made so much progress — don’t fall back into addiction by eagerly volunteering to tempt fate just to impress Brandy or (even more pathetic) your boss!

Daddy Daze, 11/25/20

Today’s Daddy Daze dispenses with the pretense that the Daddy Daze baby is a “ba”-based interlocutor and shows us its reality for what it is: the Daddy Daze daddy just blathering baroque nonsense to nobody.

Slylock Fox, 11/25/20

I know I say a lot of Slylock Fox scenes have powerful “IT BEGINS” energy vis à vis the moment when the animals rise up to destroy human civilization and create the animal-ruled world where Slylock plies his trade as a detective, but you have to admit that the “IT BEGINS” energy in today’s strip is in fact extremely strong. Those birds are going peck that kid to death, then they’re going to eat the whole bag of birdseed, then they’re going to figure out how to run the birdseed factory, after pecking to death everyone who works there.

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Stop meddling from the meddlee slot, Tommy

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Daddy Daze, 11/6/20

Daddy Daze launched in June of 2018, with a mission to bring home to readers “all the weirdness that comes with parenting, dealing with small versions of themselves who are inquisitive and sweet, and bewildering all at the same time.” But over the last two years, it’s gotten pretty much all the mileage it can out of that material, and now … now it’s diaper time. Watch out, Marvin, there’s a marginally more sophisticated purveyor of piss jokes in town.

Dustin, 11/6/20

A fun thing about being married to someone for a long time is that you become extremely well attuned to all their annoying little habits, to the point that you can call your spouse out on them before they even do them — a move that they almost certainly consider to be one of your annoying little habits.

Mary Worth, 11/6/20

Damn it, Tommy, Mary likes the excitement, the uncertainty, the chase that comes at the beginning of a new meddle. If you basically just throw yourself at her feet and sob “I suck, fix me,” you’re really going to cut into her enthusiasm for the whole process.

Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 11/6/20

Ha ha, it’s funny because Snuffy doesn’t know what “stress” means!

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Mostly domestic Sunday

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Funky Winkerbean, 10/25/20

OK, so, just to make sure we have the sequence clear, these ICE dudes arrested Adeela (who, just to emphasize, is in the United States legally) due to a bureaucratic fuckup (one that didn’t make a ton of narrative sense, but still), fast-tracked her for near-immediate deportation, resisted any attempt by her lawyer to make them re-examine the dodgy evidence that led them to their decision, and released her not because they realized they were wrong or because they reassessed their obviously broken internal processes, but because of political intervention at the highest levels. But anyway, they’re returning the Montoni’s bag, so they’re good now! No hard feelings, right? [Backslapping and laughter all around]

Daddy Daze, 10/25/20

Wow, the Daddy Daze daddy’s goth friend sure is getting extra goth today, isn’t he, moaning about how parenting makes time stretch on infinitely, such that we’re all either rapidly aging or cursed with eternal life or maybe both. Anyway, it absolutely makes sense that the Daddy Daze daddy has chosen to sit several seats away from him.

Blondie, 10/25/20

Not to brag or anything, but if I wanted to spend an evening out with a pal and possibly get home long after my wife went to sleep, I would just tell her that’s what I had planned, and if that made her uncomfortable in some way, we’d have an open and honest discussion about it. Maybe that’s weird, maybe the rest of you are all promising your spouses you’ll be home by 1 am and coming home at 3 am and getting in trouble for it, I dunno, but you know what’s a hell of a lot weirder? Dagwood thinking that only wearing his undershirt makes him quieter, somehow.

Baby Blues, 10/25/20

It’s also never occurred to me to casually ask my wife “Hey, babe, you ever fuck Spider-Man?” so maybe I just need to admit that everyone’s marriage is unique and none of us have any real idea what anybody else is doing.