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Mark Trail, 1/24/13

Here we can see the wild Rod Bassy in his usual habitat. Panel two offers a good look at one of his natural defenses: when threatened by a predator or a nosey reporter, he can puff out his plumage so that he appears twice as large as his actual size! Watch how the aggressor backs off as a result of this aggressive display.

Funky Winkerbean, 1/24/13

“So now that my husband’s died of a massive stroke, I’m at last free! Free to live the life I’ve always wanted! Free to … wait, he’s recovering? Fuck.”

Apartment 3-G, 1/24/13

Ari seems suspiciously blasé about the disaster unfolding over in 3-G, suspiciously reluctant to get the authorities involved. I’m not implying that he had anything to do with it, of course, but I do think he’s anxious because he decided in the middle of the night to go clean shaven and Greg’s caught him after he’s taken off his mustache but before he got to his beard. “I can’t let anyone think I’m deliberately cultivating this dumb little chinbeard! Especially not the fire department!”

Marvin, 1/24/13

Showing, not telling: Not satisfied with just informing us that Marvin constantly stews in a miasma of his own filth-stink, Marvin is trying to show us, via the artfully rendered reaction of others, just how awful it is being within smelling distance of him.

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Marvin, 1/5/13

Marvin is still going all-out with the poop jokes in 2013, in case you’re wondering! Though I think that this might be a first (or at least rare) instance of the strip actually using a variation of the word “poop” in the strip itself. (I was going to go back through my archives looking for varyingly explicit words for feces in the nationally syndicated comic strip Marvin, but then I remembered that I had this last shred of dignity that I was planning on hanging on to for at least another few weeks.)

Anyway, this week’s Marvin has involved Marvin and Bitsy getting stuck outside in a snowstorm, presumably while Marvin’s family celebrates his absence at a fancy restaurant. I’ve been rooting all along for this plot to reach its seemingly obvious dog-eats-baby conclusion, but the crafty Marvin has bought himself some time by making the prospect as disgusting as possible.

Herb and Jamaal and Shoe, 1/5/13

Sorry, Shoe! Herb and Jamaal has won today’s “Hey, I heard a corny old joke from a friend or maybe had it forwarded to me via e-mail, let’s see how awkward it would be turned into comic strip dialogue” contest, and by a substantial margin.

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Marvin, 12/19/12

All week, Marvin has been expressing his thoughts via standard word balloons rather than thought bubbles, which might mean something momentous except I assumed that it was just more Marvin splapdashery, where small details change constantly because who cares. BUT today Marvin seems to have suddenly made the leap from rudimentary verbalization to full-on literacy! Naturally this is just another opportunity for him to express his insatiable greed. I might also note that, much as I celebrate and indeed depend economically on the written word, I still think that the appropriate order for gaining life skills is (1) learn to go to the bathroom in a toilet, then (2) learn to read and write.

Archie, 12/19/12

The Archie Joke-Generating Laugh Unit 3000 doesn’t exactly know what noises biological lifeforms make when ingesting other biomatter for nutrition and energizing purposes, but it’s pretty sure that they’re repulsive.

Pluggers, 12/19/12

A plugger walk down memory lane is literally a walk to the grave! THIS IS THE #8 PLUGGERS OF 2012, TUNE IN OVER THE NEXT TWO WEEKS FOR OUR COUNTDOWN TO ULTIMATE HORROR