Post Content

Click the banner to contribute to the Comics Curmudgeon. Details here.

Omigaw it’s the last day of the Spring 2017 Comics Curmudgeon fundraiser — Hurry!

Between Friends, 5/5/17

Susan looks at death and disappointment the same way as Lillian from Crankshaft, and fears an afterlife tormented by regret. Her funeral director husband Harv sees death every day, and has abandoned such romantic notions. Is there anything grimmer than Canadians in despair?

[Psst … panel 4 — “don’t want to be”?]

Blondie, 5/5/17

Dithers knows that on any food-themed holiday he must abandon any pretense of running the firm that bears his name.

Somebody tell that guy in the middle that his pet monkey is up to no good again.

Judge Parker, 5/5/17

Good call, Sam, lawyer to the last — challenge Lieutenant Snouty there; explain things to him; tell him what to do. Or, if you sincerely want S.W.A.T. to back the hell off, repeat after me: “BOMB!”. Nouns are your friend, Sam.

Mary Worth, 5/5/17

Yes you should, Esme! He’s a) gorgeous, b) dark-haired, and c) a hunk! Also, d) a challenge! You want him — and you know you can have him! Most of all, we Mary Worth readers deserve some entertainment, and you are an Entertainer! You guys swear an oath or something, right? Well get on it girl, we are dying out here.

Crankshaft, 5/5/17

The week grinds on, the jokes wear thin, and attention wanes. “Exactly”? WTF, “exactly”?

Exactly.

–Uncle Lumpy

Post Content

Six Chix, 5/1/17

The fairies prepare to feast on the bodies of their mortal sisters. Their eyes gleam with hunger, though they hide their savage teeth. They number six in all: could this brood be the Chix themselves? Pray we never learn, nor how the cheese got pink.

Mary Worth, 5/1/17

Pluggers, 5/1/17

“Our marriage is an abomination, I’m having an affair with the rhinoceros, and get the hell out of my bathroom.”

Pluggers are hard of hearing and delusional.

Sally Forth, 5/1/17

I’m going to spend mine reading Sally Forth. Make some room on that couch.

–Uncle Lumpy

Post Content

Mary Worth, 4/28/17

Wow, Esme’s just groping Derek, a total stranger, like a big slab of meat, huh? I guess the rules really are different out in international waters! Meanwhile, I just hope the lady in the top hat in the background in panel one finds true love. It’s not glamorous, but somebody has to wear the hat!

Family Circus, 4/28/17

Not sure if anyone had “killed by a demonic sewer-clown” in the How Will The Keane Kids Die pool, but I don’t think we’re going to get that many complaints!