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Archive: Pluggers

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Terrible children (and old people to be fair)

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Pluggers, 1/31/25

I actually sleep with a second pillow — not because it prevents me from falling out of bed, how would that even work, honestly it makes no sense to me and looking at the drawing doesn’t make it make more sense, also do grown adults fall out of bed, this is insane — but just because I like to hold onto something while I sleep, probably a habit I picked up with stuffed animals as a kid and never truly grew out of. Very early in our relationship my wife started referring to this pillow as my “girlfriend,” a term that has stuck to this day. Anyway, that’s a long way to explain why the first thing I thought when I saw this panel was “the caption should be ‘plugger polyamory,’” which is bad, but you have to admit a lot less bad than a lot of Pluggers panels that could be captioned “plugger polyamory” might be.

Marvin, 1/31/25

Honestly if I had to pick a favorite kind of Marvin strip, it would be the ones where it’s made obvious how much Marvin’s parents dislike each other. I presume it’s because each holds the other primarily responsible for the creation of Marvin, whom they dislike even more.

Family Circus, 1/31/25

God, look at how happy she is. He’s almost asleep! Several blessed hours of unconscious Jeffy time, coming right up!

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Based on how they look and their and sexual chemistry, it should be Luke/Leia honestly

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Pluggers, 1/26/25

It’s interesting that the caption tells us that “pluggers know when they are ready for an upgrade” when the older dog-man very clearly does not know that it’s time for him to update his hearing aids. The implication casts him outside the bounds of the plugger community, which is chilling: is the age of the Boomer pluggers ending, and the era of Gen X pluggerdom, its hour come round at last, slouching towards the Pluggers HQ P.O. Box to be born? This new generation is represented by the younger dog man here, and yeah, I know these characters all have names, but I’ve been blogging about this damn strip for 18 years and I haven’t learned them yet and I’m simply not going to. I mean, let’s be real, that plugger dog-man is in his 50s, he’s got hearing aids, he’s annoyed by his elders, he’s me. That’s me there, the younger plugger dog-man. I don’t need to know his name. Anyway, I guess they’re out here in the snow because he’s going to put the older dog-man on an ice floe and then walk away.

Dennis the Menace, 1/26/25

I actually find today’s Dennis the Menace kind of charming — not, I feel I need to be clear after writing that last paragraph, because I find it relatable, I have no “plugger”-style problem in that department, thanks. I just like two specific panels: the one where Mr. Wilson emits one of his trademark beads of sweat as he announces the lack of bran cereal, as he is all too aware of the stakes here; and the one where Mrs. Wilson leans down to whisper “it keeps him moving” to Dennis, as if he has any idea what that’s supposed to mean. He’s five years old and not very bright, Martha! You gotta actually say the word “poop” if you expect him to follow what’s going on here!

Mary Worth, 1/26/25

Look, obviously Dirk is an asshole and a creep. But what about Jared, who took up his girlfriend’s idea about doing a photoshoot and immediately turned it into an opportunity for Star Wars cosplay? Isn’t that just as bad? No, obviously not. But it’s not good.

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Cancelled riff Saturday

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Shoe, 1/25/25

I was going to go on a riff here about the circumstances under which a lawyer might have to quickly shift from shoes-off relaxation to professional client acquisition mode, but you know what, I’m going to keep my eyes on the prize here: he’s a bird! He can fly! He should be flying after that ambulance, that’s by far the most efficient way to chase it! C’mon!

Pluggers, 1/25/25

I was going to go on a riff here about how I still think of seat warmers as kind of a luxury feature and it’s interesting to see famously frugal and non-elite pluggers casually using one in place of a heating pad you can get for $15 at CVS, but you know what, I’m going to keep my eyes on the prize here: that’s clearly how you would draw the panel if your original joke was about pluggers farting in their cars and then your editor was like “No, sorry, too gross,” but you were on deadline and you had to figure out how to use the same art for something else.

Bizarro, 1/25/25

Aw, I think it’s cute how sad the ghost on the right looks! I mean, I would be too if I died and found out I still had to “make plans” and “set goals.” Not doing any of that shit would be the #1 best thing about being dead!