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Pluggers, 7/29/20

You know, sometimes I feel like you guys don’t appreciate what I go through to bring you the densely referenced metatextual content you’ve come to expect here on josh reads dot com, so I thought I’d pull back the curtain on the “process” behind this post I’m writing right now, which involved searching my archives for posts that featured Pluggers and contained the word “dying.” Was it harrowing? You bet. But it was worth it because I confirmed my hunch: as a rule a plugger only owns one suit, and his primary reason for wearing it is to go to a funeral. You can understand why he might eventually buy some more, though, what with the constant parade of death and their bodies waxing and waning with the vagaries of their medication regimen. That’s what I love about these pluggers, man: I get bigger, and they stay the same age (i.e., dead).

Rex Morgan, M.D., 7/29/20

GET IT, REX? ARE YOU GETTING THE PICTURE? THE MEDICAL PRACTICE COMES AT A PRICE, AND IT’S A LOT MORE THAN A DOLLAR

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Rex Morgan, M.D., 7/26/20

Well, it looks like we’re taking a trip through Retconned Memory Lane, where Melissa Claridge, a recurring character who had appeared in the strip for decades, including as recently as 2012, has now been whittled down to a spectral presence who manifested herself exactly once, to browbeat Rex into forming a heterosexual pair-bond with the last woman with whom he had any sustained interaction, and then vanished into the ether. Next up, apparently: remember the beloved running bit where people just gave Rex and June free stuff for no good reason? Well it’s happening again!

Panels from Hagar the Horrible, 7/26/20

I genuinely love today’s Hagar throwaway panels, in which Hagar essentially orders Lucky Eddie to clamber down a sheer cliff face in order to get the two of them some beers. Eddie’s dubious facial expression really makes it for me.

Panels from Gasoline Alley, 7/26/20

“Also, a hedge fund bought the bankrupt company that owned The Gazette and a bunch of other daily papers in mid-sized cities, and the new executives immediately laid off half the reporters and paid themselves big bonuses, but it’s probably the Little Orphan Annie thing that you’re noticing, sure.”

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Rex Morgan, M.D., 7/23/20

Folks, I try to keep you appraised of the deep lore of these strips, but where I fail you, my faithful commenters and your favorite guest blogger Uncle Lumpy will pick up the slack. This stern, mysterious crone who demands that Rex take a mate isn’t just any old lady; she’s Melissa Claridge, who, as Uncle Lumpy explained in a 2012 post, insisted that Rex and June couple up back in the ’70s in first iteration of this storyline in the strip, and also, uh, used to slap around her niece, I guess.

Rex Morgan, M.D., 10/16/71

She had considerably mellowed by 2012, and had set off a wacky adventure by asking Rex and June to check in on her San Diego condo, which turned out to be full of strippers with hearts of gold. Anyway, she’s back here in her earlier guise, and if she slaps Rex into submission in order to make this love connection happen, I’m not gonna complain.

The Lockhorns, 7/23/20

I’m sure this is just a “ha ha, Leroy hates Loretta’s family” joke, but I’m reasonably sure we’ve never heard about any of the Lockhorns’ relatives before other than Loretta’s hated mother, so another thing I wouldn’t complain about is if she really does have a brother who’s a criminal, and the focus of this strip eventually shifts from Leroy and Loretta’s petty, tiresome domestic squabbles and towards this mysterious brother’s exciting crimes.