Post Content

Family Circus, 10/13/17

Man, I almost resent how blatantly the “Jeffy will someday experience a psychotic break in which his mind will beg his hands to stop the killing, but they won’t listen” joke is being lobbed my way here, but, whatever: this is what Jeffy’s going to say to the cops in 20 years after he strangles a bunch of people, probably.

Funky Winkerbean, 10/13/17

“I didn’t, though! I died! Of cancer! Don’t forget me, damn it! Don’t forget me or I’ll haunt the shit out of you”

Pluggers, 10/13/17

You’re a plugger if your body is already starting to mold itself to fit perfectly into the piece of furniture where you’re going to die.

Post Content

Judge Parker, 10/12/17

Let’s check in to see what’s up in Judge Parker, and … oh, whoops, everyone’s miserable. All their wives are in prison, or just straight up leaving them because they were a big secret-keeper about secret grandchildren and such. How strange and awful it must be for these characters, so coddled under the Woody Wilson regime, handed checks and approbation at every turn, to endure the suffering being dished out by their new Dark Lord and Master, Ces Marciuliano, which will presumably continue until the cosmic scales of karma are realigned! Look at Judge Parker Senior frowning! Did he even know what a frown was, before? Did his cheek-flesh crack as it entered a configuration entirely new to it?

Gil Thorp, 10/12/17

OK, fine, the Gil Thorp creative team really can name a specific Ed Sheeran song. Anyway, why is Rick Soto so grimly determined to resist his destiny as a teen musical sensation? Is it because of his heavy investment in violent American-style masculinity? Does he think that bashing his brain into putty makes him more of a man than being a crooner does, despite the clear evidence that belting out tunes gets all the young ladies hot and bothered?

Mary Worth, 10/12/17

I’ve been writing this blog for more than 13 years now. Some of you have been with me almost that whole time; but some of you have only recently stumbled upon this site, and you may still be wondering “what’s this thing all about, man?” Well, let me tell you: if the sight of an exasperated Colombian shouting “Señor Wilbur, you have to move too!” at Wilbur as he stands absolutely still while leaning on his prancing, jiggling girlfriend floods your brain with the kind of dopamine rush most people associate with the deepest kind of love, or maybe cocaine, then you and I are on the same wavelength, my friend.

Post Content

Gil Thorp, 10/11/17

One thing I appreciate about Gil Thorp is that it’s a strip about teenagers that goes to certain lengths to keep up with the cultural touchstones its teen characters would relate to, but not great lengths, if you follow me. It’s that kind of attitude that produces strips like today’s, in which someone bothered to figure out that golden-voiced Rick Soto would serenade his friends with a song from popular singer Ed Sheeran, but didn’t bother to determine what specific song that might be.

Blondie, 10/11/17

Meanwhile, nobody involved in the production of Blondie has any idea what an “app” is or how a person would go about buying one.