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Comment of the Week

Maybe it's just that the standards of menace have been so raised by the likes of Calvin and Hobbes or Bart Simpson but I can't remember ever seeing Dennis engage in behavior that would make him a poor children's party guest. He wears a tiny suit to church for goodness sake! He's really just a menace because the strip is called Dennis the Menace but who told the inhabitants of the strip that? Who is going around badmouthing this precocious kid who at worst doesn't always live up to 1950s standards of etiquette? I ask but we all already know it's Mr. Wilson, Mr. Wilson is making the neighbor kid a social pariah out of a sort of misplaced dissatisfaction and inadequacy that his pension wasn't enough to settle him in a gated community with no children.

—BananaSam
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“Oh, sir, you’re far too distinguished-looking to be a mere janitor!”

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Beetle Bailey, 5/20/14

Could it be that Beetle Bailey is trying, in its own weird, aimless way, to come to terms with the increasingly mechanized nature of modern warfare, in which modern soldiers are being replaced by drones and other machinery? Does Corporal Yo’s non-functional Beetle-bot represent a yearning for the days when at least human exhaustion could put the brakes on endless, merciless war? Whatever the larger significance, I think we can all agree that the best part about this robot is that nobody’s attempting to have sex with it.

Hagar the Horrible, 5/20/14

Haha, it’s funny because this lady just washed the floors, and they’re about to be covered with the blood and viscera of everyone she’s ever known and loved!

Mary Worth, 5/20/14

GOD DAMN IT TOMMY YOU GOD DAMN SELL-OUT

I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU CUT YOUR HAIR

AND WHERE DID YOU GET THAT STUPID SHIRT

FUCKING PATHETIC

“OH BUT I’M WEARING WHITE LIPSTICK, IT’S SUPER PUNK ROCK”

BULLSHIT, YOU’RE GOING TO WIPE IT OFF RIGHT BEFORE THE INTERVIEW AND YOU KNOW IT

I’M COMPLETELY DISGUSTED HERE

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At last, the entertainment industry makes a sensible decision

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Funky Winkerbean, 5/19/14

Oh, goodie, we’re back to the plot about how Les is struggling to write the script for the made-for-basic-cable version of the story of his dead wife dying of cancer! You might be forgiven for reading this and thinking that he’s just sent the script off to agents unsolicited or something. But no, he was already paid a great deal for it before he wrote it, and then he felt pretty good about writing some truly atrocious dialogue, and then he found Lisa’s diary so that he could write it even better. I guess he’s mostly mad because nobody is holding his hand and telling him how great he is? Anyway, I don’t know if I would have picked the imaginary talking cat that represents Les’s depression as the Funky Winkerbean character that would eventually start saying what we’re all thinking, but now that’s happened I’m 100% in favor.

Pluggers, 5/19/14

I normally don’t find the art in Pluggers particularly expressive, but I’m quite enjoying the terrified looks on the faces of our plugger-couple in today’s panel. “Oh … oh God. Death is coming for us. It’s coming. There’s no escape.”

Heathcliff, 5/19/14

Haha, it’s funny because the parrot thinks that the institutions of the modern bureaucratic state have an interest in maintaining its health and well-being! (Spoiler alert: the institutions of the modern bureaucratic state have no such interests.)

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Sunday quickies

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Mark Trail, 5/18/14

According to Wikipedia, Jack Elrod has been involved in Mark Trail in one capacity or another since 1950. But only now, in one of his last Sunday strips, has he managed to live out his lifelong dream of getting hardcore seahorse pornography in newspapers across the country.

Archie, 5/18/14

Dear comics artists who forgot to submit their Mother’s Day strips in time: I have some good news for you!

Blondie, 5/18/14

Look, I’m just going to come out and say what we’re all thinking: this sounds like a really shitty play.