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Family Circus, 8/28/20

My favorite facial expression in this whole crowd is definitely Barfy’s. “I’m sorry, what? You thought that was fun? Do you know that my ancestors gave up autonomy and life in the wild and hitched our stars to you clowns so we could live inside, where it’s warm and soft and there aren’t any ticks? If I wanted to be a wolf I’d still be a fucking wolf. What’s the matter with you?”

Rex Morgan, M.D., 8/28/20

Well, there have been a lot of boring plots in Rex Morgan, M.D., lately but at least this time around we’ve got a fun villain and good timely plot so I for one am excited to watch the drama unf–oh. Oh, I see, the cops have caught up with him already. Welp, that’s it for this one folks, tune in next week when [spins wheel] Buck befriends a down-on-his-luck [spins wheel again] classic car restoration expert and helps him set up a website.

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Marvin, 8/27/20

Today’s Marvin is what happens when you’re trying to come up with a joke about toilets because that’s what you do, but you want to do one that isn’t about pooping, for once, so instead you decide to do one about how children become attached to ephemeral creatures and often their deaths and the undignified disposal of their bodies is their initial introduction to the scary notion of mortality, but then you decide to bring it back around to pooping in the end because, really, isn’t it all about the pooping, when you think about it?

Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 8/27/20

Look, I don’t pretend to be consistent, but I know what I like and I know what I don’t like, and what I don’t like is Snuffy Smith trying to get “topical.”

Mother Goose and Grimm, 8/27/20

Hey, guys, fun fact: did you know that you don’t get goose down from a live goose? And that the world of Mother Goose and Grimm includes both sapient geese and goose down-filled pillows? Anyway, Grimm still likes to use Mother Goose as a living pillow. You know, for now.

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Mary Worth, 8/26/20

Like every good (?) Mary Worth story, the tale of Madi was pretty neatly wrapped up last week but is still going to keep happening for another week or maybe more, who can say, until we’re truly begging for whatever non-adventure they have lined up next. Anyway, do you think Mary’s going to stay in touch with yet another child who spent a summer hanging out with her? Mary did keep up with her wee pal Olive and even visited her in the big apple, but only because Olive was the anointed one who could predict the future, and I’m pretty sure Madi’s secret banana bread recipe knowledge can’t really compare with that.

Rex Morgan, M.D., 8/26/20

Gotta admire Rene for using a good old fashioned pen to keep track of his victims’ bank account info rather than saving it in a COMPUTER where the FBI can find it and use it as evidence in his trial. Now, is he using his own phone to make these calls, which will therefore be easily traced back to him? Yes, yes he is. But he’s on the right track, and you gotta respect his hustle.

The Phantom, 8/26/20

This nice lady “doesn’t see race”! It’s actually serious psychological and medical condition that makes it difficult for her to fully parse interpersonal relationships and social dynamics.