Post Content

Family Circus, 6/20/20

One of the Secrets of the Family Circus is that there was an original, different Big Daddy Keane, with an entirely different attitude and body plan, in the early days of the strip. While mostly he’s forgotten now, you can still see hints of him in certain panels, like today’s, which implies heavily that the Keane patriarch doesn’t really like his kids and doesn’t want to spend any time with them.

Funky Winkerbean, 6/20/20

Look, there’s plenty to say about how roles for women are cast in Hollywood, with fairly transparent sexualization and an obsession with youth, but if you’re looking to make that point in the most off-putting and unpleasant way possible, then sure, just have Les seething through the whole process about these dumb sluts who dare to play my precious Lisa. Despite hanging around his hip Hollywood pals, Les seems unfamiliar with the concept of hair and makeup professionals who’ll be able to make whatever actress is chosen look just like Lisa, changing her hair color from … oh, look, how convenient, the syndicate colorists have done it for them.

Judge Parker, 6/20/20

OH MY GOD THE SPENCER-DRIVERS ARE EXPERIENCING FINANCIAL CONSEQUENCES FROM THEIR ACTIONS????? THIS IS INSANE AND UNPRECEDENTED

Post Content

It’s time for your comment of the week!

“Change dot org petition to end every Mark Trail comic like this. ‘Well, Cherry, the lifespan of the common wood beetle is roughly’ [JUMP CUT TO BEAR]” –Dan

It’s time for your runners up!

“I have to give the Pluggers artist credit for their ability to imply a dog with a receding hairline. It shouldn’t work but it does.” –RexDartEskimoPi, on Twitter

“Who’s speaking here? Loretta’s gritting her teeth, and Leroy looks like he’s panting too heavily to be coherent. Maybe the car itself is voicing a vague threat, which explains their scramble to escape.” –Bill L

“I like to think Dagwood has been around so long, (Interjection: ‘How long has he been around, Johnny?’) so long, that he still acts like the phone has a cord, out of habit. He can’t place a call because he picks it up and waits to hear, ‘Number, please?’ Dagwood misses yield signs because he thinks they’re still yellow. He never turns his high beams off because there’s no switch on the floorboard.” –White Rabbit

Mark Trail suddenly looking like a gritty Pluggers reboot.” –pugfuggly

“Last month they read Irma’s choice, Anna Karenina. ‘Each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way,’ Irma slurred after her fifth shot of vodka, ‘and ladies, I’m living proof.’” –Mr. A

“The real headline in Sarge’s paper today: ‘Man Ghosts Dog.’” –Marcus Theory

“Why does it seem like Lilian is staring incredulously at that woman’s retreating butt? Some people have butts, Lilian. You’ll have to learn to cope.” –made of wince

“‘The Thinker is looking at his phone‘: Bad topical joke, late to the phenomenon. ‘The Thinker is touching his face’: topical and timely.” —Ettorre

“That stunned look is Lilian finally registering that her books are someone’s favorites. It’s the cognitive dissonance, more than the missed opportunity to sell a woman a book her mother already owns, that will eventually cause her delicate mind to snap. ‘I’m tired of WRITING about murders,’ Lilian will say out loud, to no one. ‘I think it’s time to try my hand at COMMITTING them.’ (Spoiler alert: She’ll turn out to be equally terrible at both.)” –Doctor Moreau

“Congratulations to Andy on obtaining Large Foreground Creature With The Conversation Far In The Back status.” –nescio

“Why would you ever ask Les if he’s ‘excited’ about something? What do you think his answer is going to be?” –Joe Blevins

“That’s not a separate compound next to Mark’s house. That’s Cherry’s house, so they can sleep without their private parts sharing nighttime air.” –Jen

“Luckily, when COVID-45 hits they’ll have this strip to pull out of the archives.” –Randllw

“Soon, the Family Circus children will attack each other in an attempt to win their father’s love and to obtain the pride of being the gift-bearer. This was all in the plan: for this father’s day, the only true gift he wanted was bloodsport.” –Mike Podgor

“Well, let’s see — who’s paying for this gift? That’s right. You kids want your Daddy’s affection, you earn it with macaroni and glue.” –Bill L

“Fascinating to see Marvin of all comics take an early stance on a topic that’s been highly debated as of late. Going to present the essential rhetorical question, ‘Who needs cops when we have bladders?’ at the next town hall meeting I’m allowed to attend.” –Irrischano

“If Gil Thorp ends with Corina hitting the winning home run against the Mudlarks, I’ll be happy. If, as she runs the bases in triumph, The Mayor starts triggering the carefully planted explosives around the field, I’ll be really happy. She runs on dark summer night under the floodlights, and as she clears each base, it explodes, throwing shrapnel and Mudlarks across the infield. She slides for home as the light towers go down, shedding sparks like falling stars. She stands, covered in dirt, as the pitcher’s mound detonates, and sheds her helmet, tossing it aloft as the bleachers erupt in fire and The Mayor runs out of the dugout to embrace her. That’s how you hit a home run, and that’s how you end a comic.” –Voshkod

“‘Someone has to protect Lisa.’ From being played by an actress Les saw in an in-flight movie. At an audition all three characters don’t want to be at, for a movie the main character doesn’t want to make at all. If you don’t see the deep emotional stakes here, you just don’t get Funky Winkerbean.” –Banana Jr. 6000

Remember: If you never want to see banner ads on this site, and want to get cool comment-editing features to boot, for a mere three dollars a month you can become a Comics Curmudgeon Supporter! If you just want to give me money directly, you can put some scratch in my tip jar, or back me on Patreon! Thanks to all for your support and readership!

About this Post

Comments are closed.

Post Content

Gil Thorp, 6/19/20

Good news from Gil Thorp, everyone! Mike “The Mayor” didn’t just slink off to the bad kid school and give up on his hopes and dreams after being expelled for bringing a butter knife into class; instead, he’s training the other bad kids at his bad kid school for an epic slobs vs. snobs baseball battle against his old Mudlark teammates. And he just found his secret weapon Corina Karenna (named, I assume, after the beloved (?) 1994 Ray Liotta/Whoopi Goldberg vehicle Corrina, Corrina), who’s very good at baseball and is a total anarchist. The infield fly rule? The “unwritten rules of baseball”? Corina will be ignoring all of them as the misfits roll over the Mudlarks in an unauthorized game played “thunderdome-style,” i.e., with no umpires, parents, or sense of decency.

Funky Winkerbean, 6/19/20

Today’s Funky Winkerbean made me realize that despite having read about the glory and pageantry of Lisa’s Story for years and years and years, I don’t actually … know what exactly Lisa’s Story is about? I mean, I know Lisa’s actual life story, but does the book/movie treatment cover the whole arc of her life, or just the cancer stuff or what? And, like, she died pretty young — Darrin, who was born when she was in high school, was in high school when she passed away, so she couldn’t have been older than her mid-30s. And she had two cancer bouts, over several years! I have no idea how young or old this actress is who Les just hate-masturbated to on the plane, and it’s true that Hollywood casts actresses young, but I’m pretty sure Les would only be satisfied without someone the age he is now, and here’s the thing, Les: Lisa stopped aging when she died.

Hagar the Horrible, 6/19/20

Ha ha, that got kind of dark, didn’t it? Well, suck it up, times are dark. Look, here’s the grimmest, realest Hagar the Horrible ever written!