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Funky Winkerbean, 10/6/19

Oh, ha ha, the thing he was wearing: his football helmet! His football helmet, which this highway patrolman yanked off his corpse to present to his widow. Do you think there’s some blood and brains and stuff inside there? Probably at least a little, right?

Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 10/6/19

I guess I’m kind of surprised that a newspaper comic did a strip about how undeveloped rural communities often turn to unsustainable extractive industries for short-term economic survival because they don’t have the luxury to consider the long-term consequences. But now that one’s here, I’m not at all surprised it’s a Snuffy Smith.

Judge Parker, 10/6/19

Were you worried that Marie’s new gig with the Spencer-Drivers wouldn’t entail a bunch of emotional labor? Well, good news!

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Funky Winkerbean, 7/26/19

Well, I guess, uh, Jessica’s Big Hollywood Experiment is over, now that she has … not produced her long-ago promised documentary about her father, John Darling (seriously, this never came out, right?) and she and Cindy solved the Big Butter Brinkel Mystery (with that classic trope, “the talking chimpanzee was the real killer all along“). Just as her husband before her turned down the chance to work as a storyboarder on the next big-budget Starbucks Jones movie so he could toil away at a comics startup based in a dying cancer cluster of a town in northeast Ohio, she has now turned down the chance to be a assistant cinematographer on the next big-budget Starbucks Jones movie, so that she can do … something, I guess … in a dying cancer cluster of a town in northeast Ohio. Her logic is that she didn’t want to suffer what her father, John Darling, suffered from being in “the biz,” and despite the fact that local newscasting is in no way the same “biz” as cinematography or narrative filmmaking, you can see why she’d be worried about going down that road, since her father turned out to be a huge asshole who was murdered in an aggressively wacky manner. Was learning about Butter Brinkel’s murderous what made her realize she was in too deep? Was she worried that she, too, would be killed by Zanzibar or his successors because she knows too much? Is she laying low in Westview to stay safe from the Monkey Mob?

Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 7/26/19

Obviously I know Hootin’ Holler is behind the times, but it’s wild that they’re just now getting into Vine.

Dick Tracy, 7/26/19

“That’s pop culture for you! It sure is a shared language and set of experiences we can use as a shorthand to communicate with one another! Ha ha!”

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Funky Winkerbean, 7/20/19

I have to admit, this absolutely bonkers “killer chimp” reveal has at least gotten me seriously emotionally invested in Funky Winkerbean, event though my investment is basically in seeing how much more bonkers it’s going to get. Today Cindy posits that Zanzibar was “jealous,” which … hasn’t really been explored in the strip, as far I’ve noticed? And also Cliff let Butter leave town with a talking, thinking, murderous ape??? How did he know Zanzibar wasn’t going to kill again? Who would stop him? Certainly not Butter Brinkel! How many corpses did Butter and Zanzibar leave in their wake as they fled from state to state across the country?

The whole vibe this episode is a delightful (for certain admittedly very limited definitions of “delightful”) throwback not to the Funkyverse’s actual zany past but to the moment when the strip was shifting gears from its zany past to its ultra-depressing present. “There’s a chimp who can talk and also he murdered an innocent woman and ruined countless lives” definitely fits in with “There’s a zany dude who goes by ‘Plantman’ who dresses up as a plant and is also a murderous maniac.”

Rex Morgan, M.D., 7/20/19

I have to admit it’s kind of charming how these two are talking frankly and cheerfully about their jobs as scam artist: giving professional praise, coming up with ideas for new revenue streams, brainstorming the details of possible strategies, and so on. I’m also intrigued that we have yet to see the sinister puppetmaster’s face, but, just like an actual puppetmaster, he’s always dressed in black. You know who else dresses all in black?

THAT’S RIGHT, BABY, IT’S RENE THE ART FORGER

HE’S NOT SATISIFED WITH FORGING ART, NOW HE’S PUTTING OUT FAKE MEDICAL SERVICES TOO

HE’S THE BAD BOY OF THIS STRIP AND HE DOESN’T CARE WHOSE TOES HE STEPS ON

BUT HE’S ALWAYS POLITE AND ENCOURAGING TO HIS ACCOMPLICES BECAUSE THAT’S JUST THE KIND OF GUY HE IS

Pluggers, 7/20/19

For most of us the facts of life are about sex. For pluggers, they’re about the lifetime of unacknowledged and unappreciated domestic and emotional labor their wives have put in to keep them alive. Ha ha, it’s funny because if the chicken-lady dies, the dog man won’t survive for six months without her!

Mark Trail, 7/20/19

Does … does Mark Trail know how mines work? I’m pretty sure this isn’t how mines work.