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Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 10/31/16

On today, Satan’s favorite holiday, Snuffy Smith makes a big show of his contempt for God!

Crankshaft, 10/31/16

Crankshaft serves a vital role in his community, but he’s so bad at his job that some of the people who depend on him angrily vandalized his house!

Dennis the Menace, 10/31/16

Mr. Wilson has no qualms about telling Dennis that he believes the child to be a literal demon, from hell!

Hi and Lois, 10/31/16

Dot and Ditto are trying to bring a divided nation together politically, but their candy-based tax proposals will lead to economic ruin!

Mary Worth, 10/31/16

Wilbur definitely will not be regretting spending the next year far, far away from his sad sack daughter and his girlfriend who wants to spend all her time closely monitoring her pill-popping son!

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Crankshaft, 9/28/16

“Your sister’s taking your dad to the ballet? Good luck with that one!” said the guy who we’ve never seen engaging in anything more culturally uplifting than slouching on the sofa and staring at the TV with dead eyes.

Rex Morgan, M.D., 9/28/16

The artists and writers may change, but one thing remains constant: a good Rex Morgan pissyface. That’s it, Rex. Squint and grimace as you tally up exactly how much each of these features adds to the price of the house. Thaaaaat’s the stuff.

Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 9/28/16

This is definitely one of the most terrifying thought balloons in Snuffy Smith to date! I can’t really articulate why but I definitely feel that Loweezy should stay away from the bake sale, for her own safety.

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Judge Parker and Gil Thorp, 9/17/16

Saturday is a natural point for a mid-plot cliffhanger for a soap opera strip, and these two offer a great Goofus-and-Gallant-style class on how this effect can — and can’t — be achieved. Start with Judge Parker: we all thought Sophie was fine, but it looks we popped the cork on the champagne a little early, eh guys? Because it’s Honey who crawled living from the wreckage, and Sophie who’s apparently still dangling there, proving, if we needed further proof, that Honey was the steel-willed one all along. So is Sophie OK? Is the whole band dead? Does Honey think she’s Sophie? Have the Spencer-Drivers, who only got the call from the police in the first place due to the unseemly influence they have over the local government and services thanks to their wealth and power, bothered to contact the parents of anyone else in that car, who presumably are also worried about their missing children?

Meanwhile, in Gil Thorp, a girl decided to quit the soccer team and become a student trainer. Forgive me if I say this doesn’t bring us to quite the same thrill level.

Crankshaft, 9/17/16

Shoutout to the Cleveland State Comics Club who, when tasked with coming up with a plot for Crankshaft, settled on “What if Crankshaft did ’shrooms?”