Archive: Lockhorns

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Pluggers, 10/31/25

Sorry, I don’t think you should be exclaiming “What have you done?” to a guy in a toga unless he just banded together with other patriots to stab his longtime friend and political ally to death to preserve the constitutional order of the Roman Republic. I guess he really should be covered in blood to make this work but I stand by it.

Family Circus, 10/31/25

Why is Big Daddy Keane attempting to hide behind a tree like this? It’s not because his kids are embarrassed to be seen with him, as they’re gleefully pointing him out to this poor woman uninterested in their family psychodrama. If he’s embarrassed to be seen with them then I get it, but he’s doing such a bad job of hiding that I have to say that he’s no prize either.

The Lockhorns, 10/31/25

Leroy and Loretta hate each other with such intensity that it’s easy to miss that they’re not real big fans of anyone else either. Have you ever aggressively worn a Halloween costume at a specific person? Leroy has, and that’s what makes him great.

Mary Worth, 10/31/25

Oh, you went into solution-search mode, Mary? Because it sounds like the solution was quickly found by Olive, thanks to her telepathic gifts. You didn’t do shit!

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The Lockhorns, 10/24/25

Loretta has, presumably, been jogging for some time with her friend acquaintance who we are definitely never going to see again, and is only now passing by her husband, who has been sitting on that bench staring contemplatively into space for who knows how long. Because absolutely nothing the Lockhorns do is left to chance, especially when it comes to attempting to passive-aggressively destroy one another emotionally, we must assume that she carefully planned both her route and her conversational cadence so that this little bon mot would drop just as she was getting close enough for Leroy to hear it.

Mother Goose and Grimm, 10/24/25

I’m a normal person, so I do almost all my shopping either online or in a store, but some people do it over the phone, I guess? Maybe they’re all old and increasingly senile and the person on the other end has to say “Shopping…” every once in a while, just to remind them what they’re doing.

Pluggers, 10/24/25

Gah, pathetic, there’s no joke or wordplay or anything here, it’s literally just “Pluggers continue to engage in a traditional cultural/aesthetic practice, unlike most people, who have abandoned it or never knew about it in the first place.” They didn’t even put a plugger in the cartoon! I’d like to think they all refused to participate in such a half-assed non-gag.

Crankshaft, 10/24/25

I love how depressed this guy looks in the final panel. He doesn’t want to say this shit any more than you want to listen to it!

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Panel from Slylock Fox, 10/12/25

Look, by anthropomorphic animal logic, it’s fine to have an anthropomorphic animal wearing a shirt but no pants or underwear. But what you can’t do is have such a character standing right next to another character who’s talking about the fact that animals in this universe wear underwear, because then all anyone is gonna think about is WHY IS THAT DUCK NOT WEARING UNDERWEAR OH MY GOD

Panel from The Lockhorns, 10/12/25

I’m not going to say that The Lockhorns are great art by any stretch of the imagination, but I will say that there are certain things that the workshop that generates Lockhorns panels absolutely nails, and one of those things is a facial expression I call “chewing joylessly.”

Rhymes With Orange, 10/12/25

You know, newspaper comics as a medium were thriving in 1933. Do you think that once the 21st Amendment was enacted, there were a bunch of extremely square strips that were like, “Ha ha, alcohol! The intoxicant we all know about!” I assume not, because I assume the majority of contemporary comics artists were raging drunks.