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Mother Goose and Grimm, 6/27/25

Look, we all associate Cinderella with trying on glass slippers, but canonically, the Prince’s retinue repeated the process over and over again with different girls, and once Cinderella put it on and proved her identity, that was the end of the glass-slipper-trying-on process. She only had to do it once! And she didn’t really wear glass slippers after that! Why would she want to wear them again as an old woman, as if she were in the habit of it? I know that fact-checking a cartoon is boring and lame, but I feel like we should hold a strip that’s literally called Mother Goose and Grimm to a higher standard.

Alice, 6/27/25

I know you all rely on me for keeping you up to date on the lore developments in the insane fever dream comic Alice, so here’s the latest: the weird Alice aliens live underneath Alice’s floorboards now, and one of them is in love (?) with her? More on this as it develops in new and insane ways!

Dennis the Menace, 6/27/25

Look at Mr. Wilson’s face. That’s the expression of a guy who’s either going to get rich at the blackjack table or die via suicide by casino security. Either way, he’s not gonna have to deal with this brat again.

Heathcliff, 6/27/25

They banned spiral hams and are putting our Heathcliff in prison, when are people gonna wake up to what’s going on in our country

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Dustin, 6/26/25

I really love the fact that Ed looks utterly joyless as he prepares to shove that forbidden donut down his donut hole. He doesn’t even want it, really; he’s just eating it to make some kind of point in his long-running battle with his wife that she’s never even going to find out about.

Pluggers, 6/26/25

This plugger, on the other hand, is gazing upon that expired can of beans with a keen expression of mingled trepidation and desire that borders on the erotic. Surely there are some risks worth taking, he thinks. Is botulism really such a terrible way to go out?

Hi and Lois, 6/26/25

Obviously Dot and Ditto did not enjoy Hi’s bedtime story, so I have to assume that the big smiles on their faces indicate that, in the moment just before they slipped off into unconsciousness, they realized that finally they weren’t going to have to listen to any more blather about fucking golf.

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The Lockhorns, 6/25/25

I really like the way Leroy is clutching his chest dramatically here. I imagine he already did this routine inside at the concession stand cash register, and Loretta is extremely over it, but now some new people have come along upon whom he can inflict this bit. Or, perhaps even better, he’s doing it specifically because he knows it will humiliate Loretta by forcing her to explain the bit to these people, whom I assume to be total strangers to the Lockhorns. I truly will never tire of analyzing in minute detail the passive aggressive antics that these two will never tire of subjecting each other to.

Luann, 6/25/25

Man, remember when this strip’s ribaldry was over-the-top and grotesque? Now nobody involved can seem to muster up any energy as they talk about handling buns and weenies or biting into dripping, phallic breakfast food or whatnot. Sad!

Beetle Bailey, 6/25/25

Remember when “Miss Buxley Wednesday” was a fun, wholesome opportunity to see an old man (audience stand-in) ogling his sexy secretary? Now it’s just women callously announcing that their professional and economic futures are secure while an old man (audience stand-in) weeps about the fact that society has abandoned him. Maybe political correctness has gone too far?