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It’s the 2026 Comics Curmudgeon Summer Fundraiser! If you like newspaper comics with a little gentle ribbing on the side, help us keep it going with a generous contribution. Thanks!

Shoe, 7/22/26

NO MUFFY NO HE’S REACHING FOR YOUR BEAK HE THINKS IT’S A [horrible wrenching sounds, bird-agony noises].

Crock, 7/22/26

… and maybe a thesaurus?

Say, doesn’t that bird look awfully glum for somebody in the cheer-distribution business? Sure, most of your clientele in that game will be sad sacks like Figowitz here. Maybe you even bear their burdens, like a sad clown or depressed comedian. But if you’re doling out industrial packages of cheer, who’s going to complain if you skim off a little for yourself? It’s not embezzlement, it’s self-care!

Mark Trail, 7/22/26

Happy Trail ditches his evil grifter fiancée Gail at the altar to care for the gorillas suffering from her neglect. Mark can’t just stand there; he has to do something—but there’s not a single villain in punching range.

Judge Parker, 7/22/26

Sophie didn’t mean to walk that way, just like the artist probably didn’t mean to slap down that inscription without correcting the perspective—but you go with what you got, I guess.

Hey, is this when manipulative brat adorable pixie Charlotte learns Sophie’s tragic backstory? It’s time that child learned how the world works: You can’t just shoot people for money like her Mom does, you gotta go out and inherit it!

—Uncle Lumpy

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Shoe, 7/14/26

I appreciate that this joke could’ve worked fine by just saying that ol’ Uncle Herm was a lousy bowler; but no, we also gotta work in the fact that he was a big drunk as well. It’s nice to see the Perfesser is continuing the family tradition of nephews having a semi-close relationship with their alcoholic uncles. Will Skyler make visits to the graveyard to leave flowers on his tombstone when he dies, an event that, based on his general vibes, always seems imminent?

Dennis the Menace, 7/14/26

“The only motivations other people have for doing things all involve their feelings about me, the main character of reality” is admittedly a pretty menacing attitude to go through life with. You have to hand it to Dennis today, menace-wise!

Pluggers, 7/14/26

“Even the small bits of pleasure pluggers once took in everyday life have been transformed into nagging, painful reminders of their failing bodies.” —Pluggers, the comic strip beloved (???) by pluggers everywhere

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Mark Trail, 6/19/26

Oh wow, I think this gorilla sanctuary storyline is adding yet more layers of moral complexity. If you ran a failing gorilla sanctuary and needed a cash infusion to keep these noble creatures well cared for, how far would you go to do it? Would you scam a guy online for money? Would you have sex with him if he showed up in person? Would you marry him, if he asked, which Mark’s dad did, by the way? Would you give the gorillas to a more successful sanctuary? No to that last one? You’ll do the sex/marriage thing, instead? Interesting. Interesting.

Marvin, 6/19/26

There’s lots of philosophical yammering these days about whether AI chatbots are intelligent or sentient or however you want to describe it. From my perspective, there’s only one way I’ll admit that a machine-mind could be a being like me with inalienable rights: if it loathes Marvin, the main character in the comic strip Marvin, as much as I do.

Shoe, 6/19/26

“A bird? A bird that can talk and play guitar? Like a bird with feathers, the kind that flies in the fucking sky? Thank God you warned us. Deploy the police. Call in the army. We’ve got to stop this monster before it’s too late for the good people of Kansas City.”