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Beetle Bailey, 3/8/18

I really appreciate General Halftrack’s heavy-lidded expression in panel two here. Without this cue, we’d interpret “Egad!” as being an indicator of genuine shock. But looking at him, we know it’s muttered under his breath with mingled contempt and disgust. He’s horrified by the deviants and weirdos who serve under his command, but he’s no longer surprised by them.

Blondie, 3/8/18

Today is International Women’s Day, and a bunch of comics did strips observing it in various ways! Blondie didn’t do an explicit shoutout, but we can see that the creators have really focused on important women’s issues, like the fact that they’re terrible drivers, amiright fellas?

Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 3/8/18

“Of course, what with th’ terrible poverty an’ awful state of education in Hootin’ Holler, none of you girls are can grow up t’be lawyers or really much of ennythin’ else that call for book learnin’! That’s why yore feminist analysis has t’ take socioeconomic class into account!”

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Spider-Man, 2/21/18

So J. Jonah Jameson showed up in this strip a couple days ago, and I assumed it was because he as a newspaperman was chasing the big story of Spider-Man fighting with a giant lizard on the roof of a hospital in broad daylight. But, no, I guess he’s at some unspecified “business conference” where some of his business buddies wanted to engage in some classic business conference R&R: taking a boat into a swamp! I’m heartened to see that even though JJJ is of course a loud-mouthed alpha male, he, like me, hates nature and wants to spend as little time in it as possible.

Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 2/21/18

Also a couple days ago, Snuffy Smith found his father, who he … hadn’t seen in years and, one has to think, assumed was dead? Except he was just sleeping against a tree stump, Rip Van Winkle-style, and couldn’t be woken up. I know modern medicine hasn’t made a huge impression on Hootin’ Holler, but you’d think “don’t move the sick or injured, and definitely don’t drag them roughly across uneven ground for miles” would just be common sense.

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Mary Worth, 2/14/18

Hmm, it seems that Mary, normally so firm in her boundaries, has internalized the pernicious idea that she has no right to her own bodily autonomy! Mere seconds after being visibly alarmed by Ted’s lingering frotteurist farewell and then essentially yelling him out the door, she already tries to normalize the experience in her own mind by dismissing Ted as a mere “character.” Who is going to raise her consciousness? Candidates are thin on the ground. Tobey? Dawn? My guess is Iris, who will return the favor Mary did in giving her permission to pursue Zak by explaining what it’s like being with a woke bae who knows all about consent and is also extremely hot and rich.

Dick Tracy, 2/14/18

Meanwhile, Dick Tracy is pulling away from showing us a literal alien invasion of earth and moving on to a much more exciting storyline: a man with goofy hair plans to purchase an off-brand Chili’s!

Barney Google and Snuffy Smith, 2/14/18

Every Valentine’s Day, Loweezy has to indulge Snuffy’s kink of having sex in a boat, and she is not feeling it this year.

Six Chix, 2/14/18

HEY MAN MAYBE THE BICHON WOULDN’T HAVE LEFT YOU IF YOU HADN’T TRIED TO POISON HER