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Hi and Lois, 2/14/05

When I read this installment of Hi and Lois in the newspaper, I thought that there could be no greater horror than the sight of Hi making what appear to be “bedroom eyes” at Lois. Then I downloaded the colorized version of the comic, only to be confronted with inky blackness of the heart-shaped candy box that Hi has purchased, which I presume signifies some sort of S&M relationship between the two of them. I’d cry “But what about the children?” except that I’m reasonably sure that no children actually read Hi and Lois.

Trying to avert my mind away from the vision of Hi and Lois in fetish gear, I note that I’m not the only person with a home-based business who’s sometimes still wearing a robe when their partner comes home from the office. Of course, in Lois’ case, it just makes it all the easier to quickly change into … damn it, that didn’t work.

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Hi and Lois, 11/7/04

The list of comics strips that have not used drug lingo is a bit shorter today. I have to admit that Hi and Lois’ place on that list, just above Hagar the Horrible and just below Family Circus, always seemed pretty secure to me, but apparently I was wrong about the extent to which drug culture has infiltrated the funny pages. For the record, the word that’s really alarmed me here is “peaking.” All the other stuff could be derived third-hand from bad movies like Flashback, but “peaking” … it arouses suspicions. I’m just saying.

(Note to my mom: I only learned about the word “peaking” from other kids myself, not from personal experience. Really. Winners don’t use drugs. I’m my own person!)

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Hi and Lois, 11/2/04

Of course, comics should have a slightly (or perhaps extremely) skewed worldview, but they’re best when that worldview is internally consistent. It’s not just funny when people say wacky thing; it’s funny when people say wacky things and other people react to them as if they’re normal.

That’s why this strip fails for me. Not only is Mr. Thurston’s question about cartoon characters totally without context and deranged (were there any cartoon characters running in previous years? Ross Perot doesn’t count), but Hi’s reaction to this question is exactly what your reaction would be: wide-eyed horror. That’s not a joke, that’s just dementia.

Fun fact about Hi and Lois: Mr. Thurston was once referred to continually as “Thirsty” and had the bright red tell-tale nose of a drunk. Now the nose and the nickname are gone, though the slovenliness and dysfunctional marriage remain. Maybe his question comes from a bad case of the DTs.