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Hi and Lois, 6/5/22

I think telling stories out of chronological order has gone from being an innovation to something of a crutch or gimmick at this point, but there are times when it still works. Like, I’m thinking about this Hi and Lois from a couple weeks ago totally differently now that I know that the twins are trying to get extra scoops of breakfast ice cream at like 8 in the morning, and their dad is waiting in the car because he’s still groggy and disoriented.

Crankshaft, 6/5/22

One of my very first shocking insider discoveries about the comics-production process when I started doing this blog was that the daily strips were colored in by syndicate folks who aren’t the strip artist, leading to occasionally troubling errors. But the Sunday strips? Those, in theory, are colored by the same people who draw them, which means you can treat the entire scene as a unified whole. That explains why all these people have fallen asleep, because they’ve clearly decided to have their Sunday Afternoon Book Club at a law office and are having a hard time staying engaged while reading the identically bound volumes of the city code cover to cover.

Rex Morgan, M.D., 6/5/22

I love how angry Rex looks when he says “You want me to come down there in the middle of the night just to save somebody’s life?” but as soon as the cop is like “Nah, you’d just get in the way,” he’s like, “Of course, officer, I’ll help in any way I can. I’m a hero!”

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Beetle Bailey, 5/30/21

Hope you’re having a happy somber and meaningful Memorial Day, everybody! Beetle Bailey, America’s #1 only military-themed comic strip, is honoring our war dead by depicting our NCOs as brutes whose murderousness can only be deflected by their encouraging their ravenous appetites. Someone has desperately spray-painted “ALWAYS REMEMBER!” on one of Camp Swampy’s buildings, in an attempt to force these people to remember the real purpose behind today’s celebration (it didn’t work).

Hi and Lois, 5/30/21

Hi Flagston is so disgusted by his brother-in-law’s unit that he and Thirsty are spending Memorial Day giving what I assume is a shoutout to Popeye and, by extension, the forgotten veterans of the Merchant Marine, who had a higher rate of casualties during World War II of than any other service.

Marvin, 5/30/21

Speaking of stolen valor, I think it’s important that names like “M.U.T.T.” only be used for robot dogs, with the initials standing for “Multipurpose Unified Technological Terrier” or something like that. Insult Bitsy without treading on the prerogatives of the noble cyber-dogs, Marvin!

Dick Tracy, 5/30/21

“Oh, man, that sounds like white collar crime, which I definitely don’t care about. Next you’re gonna ask me to do something about wage theft! Ha ha, go call some lib who cares!”

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Rex Morgan, M.D., 5/29/22

This is definitely one of the on-purpose funniest Rex Morgan strips in years, made funnier by its sort of shambolic, shaggy dog structure, where just a lot of random things happen and there isn’t any real point to any of it. Turns out the police force put their two oldest, creakiest cops on the costumed vigilante case, which is too bad because he used his magic slippery soap to completely incapacitate both of them and amble slowly away, holding a dude at gunpoint. Then you’ve got green sweater guy, who’s been downing beers at the bar for who knows how long, but finally realizes that his car alarm is going off (the car alarm must’ve been going off for the last week’s worth of strips, by the way) and stumbles over there to look dumbly at his windshield. The fact that Local Thug #2 is a little charmed by the random nickname one of these cops just gave him from a prone position is icing on the cake. Kudos all around!

Hi and Lois, 5/29/22

I’ve often wondered why Irma, who obviously despises her husband, stays with him. Turns out it’s because she’s economically dependent on him and has no choice. Grim stuff!

Daddy Daze, 5/29/22

“It ruins the soup. The soup is my life, in this metaphor. You’ve ruined my life! God, that feels good to get that off my chest.”