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Six Chix, 5/14/19

The most prevalent forms of urban fauna in my neck of the woods are feral cats and coyotes, so I had to check to see of “Deer Be Gone” spray was an actual thing — it is, and it’s a supposedly non-toxic liquid that just adds an unpleasant flavor to plants. Still, the deer’s panicked reaction has me sticking with my initial take on this cartoon, which is that the lady was originally levelling a rifle at the deer until someone at the syndicate remembered that killing Bambi’s mom tested badly with audiences.

Marvin, 5/14/19

You have to really respect Marvin for constantly innovating in its core mission, which is to present you with scenarios where one character comes in unwanted contact with the feces of another character, much to the pooping character’s delight.

Rex Morgan, M.D., 5/15/19

Oh, man, remember when the boys got the eggs out of the fridge? I don’t, because we never actually saw it in this strip, but it sure would’ve been fun to see! More fun than today’s strip, in which we’re explicitly told that literally nothing of note happened.

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Pajama Diaries, 4/26/19

I’ve got a solid five months of reading the Pajama Diaries under my belt, and I feel comfortable in saying that I pretty much know what its lane is, and that lane is “anxiety-ridden parents of teens try to enjoy life but can’t, really, because of anxiety.” Their lane is not “middle aged suburban lowkey kinksters.” That lane is occupied by Arlo and Janis. Sorry, Pajama Diaries, I’m going to have to request that you stay in your lane.

(Also, the strip’s Wikipedia page claims that it takes place in Ohio, so I’m going to assume that “safety word” is a regional variation for “safe word,” like how my cousins in Columbus thought “sneakers” was the dumbest word they ever heard but said “tennies” like it was totally normal.)

Rex Morgan, M.D., 4/26/19

I like Sarah’s pensive look in the first panel here. She seems to be thinking, “Wait, I know I have amnesia, but I have this feeling that I’m the one who’s supposed to be getting free stuff from some person of inexplicable means. This doesn’t feel right. It doesn’t feel right at all.”

Hagar the Horrible, 4/26/19

Ha ha, it’s funny because Lucky Eddie’s uncle was injured, leaving hin unable to continue the violent means by which he gained sustenance in his medieval environment. Probably he’s going to die in poverty, and soon!

Beetle Bailey, 4/26/19

Ha ha, it’s funny because Beetle got mauled by a bunch of raccoons! There’s a good chance he has rabies now?

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Rex Morgan, M.D., 4/24/19

Hey, occasional Rex Morgan readers! Remember Edward, the cruel bully who pulled an “Emperor’s New Clothes” on Sarah’s art, but then Sarah raised up a rebellion against him, and then later Sarah got amnesia and then Edward became nice and protected Sarah, after she had to go to a public school? Well, I guess we’re back to another story about how bullying is bad, and also how the only thing that can stop a bad bully is a good bully, a good, huge bully who can just beat the ever-loving crap out of the bad bully, for justice.

Hi and Lois, 4/24/19

Gotta love how depressed Hi looks in this strip! At first you might think that it’s because Trixie doesn’t appreciate all the hard work he’s done to clean the windows and just foolishly attributes the stronger light coming into the house to “sun vitamins.” But of course, in-universe, the other Flagstons can’t “hear” or otherwise perceive the dialogue in Trixie’s thought balloons, because otherwise they’d know that they have a baby capable of fully adult cognition and they’d probably be much more freaked out. No, Hi is just depressed because chores suck and he doesn’t want to do them.